Separate names with a comma.
We were so poor growing up that for breakfast we had ordinary K
I'm not saying I w*nk a lot but I'm off out to by a Labrador just in case my mam was right.
Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office:
When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher, i sew da...
I saw Siamese twins fighting last night.
They ended up bleeding to death after I'd separated them.
I went on a date with a woman whose online profile said she had an "infectious smile".
She had cold sores.
I couldn't sleep last night so I decided to play on my drums.
I also learnt that my neighbour has Tourette's
I've started writing poetry.
I've just got the R and the Y left to do.
In Ireland today, a Cork man was found floating in the sea
I got caught w*nking over the female athletes earlier
Mr Smith from Class 2B said I completely ruined sports day.
To the gentleman that left his £20,000 Diamond studded Gold Rolex in the Casino last night
The time is now 18:32
Closer to home, he may not get on with Simms, may have been offered more. Do any of us know. Anyway fk the c*nt never rated him anyway<laugh>.
Has the McArthur rumour from Celtic fell by the wayside then or is that all it was. Just another name thrown into the ring.
I was having a cuppa with the wife this morning and she saved me from choking to death on a custard cream.
She'd f*cking eaten them all.