Wid Ye?

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Couples ‘will buy sex robots for threesomes to spice up their love lives’, expert warns

It’s not exactly a ‘classic’ threesome – you, your lover… and a talking machine with latex skin and metal bones. But that’s going to be one of the main uses for sex robots – as couples turn to the technology to ‘spice up’ stale love lives, an expert has claimed.
The first sex robots – which will talk and respond to their ‘lovers’ in a human-like fashion – are to go on sale in 2017. Relationships expert Ian Kerner says, ‘I could see couples using them to enact fantasies, such as a threesome, that they might not feel comfortable trying with real people. ‘
‘If one partner has a higher libido, a robot could allow him or her to enjoy a fulfilling sex life without straying

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The machines – equipped with warm ‘human-like’ genitals – will be programmed to fulfill people’s desires – and that might be difficult to resist, experts have said.
Writing in the Mail on Sunday, David Levy author of Love and Sex With Robots says, ‘This coming wave of sex robots will be humanlike in appearance and size. They will have human-like genitals. And they will allow intercourse according to their owner’s sexual orientation and tastes.
‘The machines in question are being developed by Abyss Creations at their Californian factory, and are likely to retail for around $15,000 (£12,300). But we can be certain that rival companies in America, Japan and Korea are scrambling to catch up.


Anyone up for banging a robot?

 

****ing right ah wid. You get yer hole without all the grief you get from real women like, "how did you get into my house" etc

 

You, my friend, need to invest in a high-quality blackjack. I sent away for one.

 

F..k knows what the Amazon delivery guy will think when he knocks on my door with the Deluxe version and a gross of Duracell!

 

How come they can make realistic faces for sex dolls but I'm still stuck looking like a bust which has been poorly-carved from a candle?

 

Yeah, I'm not sure what he will think either

 

How will you feel when you go down on the cyborg to muff 'her' out and instead of the erotic minge smell (fish and piss) you end up getting a whiff of WD40!

It's a no from this muff diving extremist.

 

It will just be like licking a battery, the same way it was when you first licked a bird's arsehole, it'll be fine

 

FYI monica - a 'blackjack' is an inferior type of cosh. Stick to the tried and trusted, my friend

 

Hahaha I was actually wondering why the **** he was going on about the casino. Thanks, Gambol. Hoorah!

 

Shamelessly stolen from a stand-up comedian whose name escapes me.

 

The stand up comedian wouldn't have made it up, that joke is ****ing years old, it is that old I can't actually remember what year I made it up

 

You need a decent one. I fill mine with birdshot.

 

Ye canny beat the classics - walk up behind her - cosh across the back of the legs - skirt over her heid - sorted.

 

I think I may have just made a mistake by giving away my modus operandi on a public forum.

^^^^^^ Ignore this guy! Prank call! Prank call!

 

Kidney shot every time.

 

You can also make your own DIY cosh using little more than a length of garden hose, some ball bearings and duct tape.

 

Do yous beat women up?

That's not cool bro

LYT are now aware

 

I never specified a species or gender of my cowardly attacks. Gambol did though...