...... but not a Martin Luther King one! You know you have been spending too much time studying, when it affects your subconcious! Well here it is, as I remember it. Is it an omen? Or just too much cheese? I had been asked to ride Maarek in the Beverly Bullet (stop laughing, it is just a dream!) and of course I said yes. Despite being a 15 stone septegenarian who has never even sat on a horse before - how hard can it be? But dreams have a way of glossing over the details, and obviously I'm a 7 stone pocket dynamo now! I remembered something QM once said (think it was QM, apologies if not) that conditionals get their weight allowance because they NEED it, when riding against more experienced jocks. So Evanna gets special permission from the authorities to get an increased allowance because of my extreme noviceness, and Maarek is now in receipt of a further 21lb off his back! (stop ****ing laughing - it's MY dream!) Anyway - I don't recall any of the preliminaries - I'm suddenly in the plate and being led out onto the track. My mount is behaving quite nicely, held by his lad. Then the lad lets go, and we are off. Oh my ****ing god, the docile Maarek is going hell for leather down to the start. What's the matter with the beast? I'm hanging on and shouting whoah, whoah, as loud as I can (that's STOP in horse speak, yes?) but either he doesn't know the lingo or he's deaf as a post! The stalls are coming up fast, and I'm preparing to bail out, when he starts to slow to a mere trot. It seems he likes to be with the other horses, and soon he is circling with the rest, my heart has stopped hammering and I'm beginning to think, that it wasn't so bad after all. Then he spots Kingsgate Native. It appears that they have unfinished business, as when he gets within striking distance he tries to take a chunk out of his rival, but only succeeds in takiing a nip at Graham Lee's leg. Graham's none to pleased, and a tad sore as he guides Kingsgate away from my nag. They are loading quickly, and here we go into stall one. the flag is raised, and we are off. I get lucky as Maarek dwells in the box and we are stone cold last. Better than trying to jockey around up the front! The way I see it, the beast has far more experience than me, so just let him get on with it - he knows what to do. I hope. We have made up some ground and are now equal last with something ridden by Jamie Spencer (I know he's not in the race - it's a dream, remember) I look across and say "alright Jamie?", he says "Fine thanks, how are you doing, Jamie? "Going to sit at the back until 2 out then give him his head?" I'm confused .... "I'm Reebs" I say. "I know" says Jamie, "I was being ironic, seeing as it's what you always say about me" Smart arse. We are approaching halfway, and Maarek seems to be going well, with three rivals behind us. Then he sees Kingsgate Native again. He has increased his speed and is angling out to get to KN, fortunately there are still a couple between us and him. KN has quickened too, and Graham is pushing, pushing. I am now reduced to just hanging on. All pretence of riding now forgotten, as self preservation takes priority, whip discarded in favour of having both hands on the reins, and a fistful of mane for good measure. We are inside the last furlong, and now there is no barrier between KN and my lunatic, who is definitely going in for the kill. The line is coming up fast but Maarek only has eyes for his nemesis. Graham finally sees the beast almost at his flank, and takes avoiding action. It isn't much, but it's enough, and Maarek and me are past the post in first place. I'm dreading having to pull this fellow up - clearly WHOAH, doesn't cut it no matter how loud you shout, but I needn't have worried as KN has been turned and is heading for the exit, and my beast still has evil on his mind! Then I woke up.
Whatever you put in your night-time Horlicks, you clearly need to stop. You were supposed to claim weight OFF, not put the extra ON. Might have been closer if you had carried it!
Nice one, Reebs! Pity the jockey and starter were the ones really in a dream today. It was the first time I've ever seen a horse with the hood still on after the gates had opened. Maarek was actually the last to load and left the stalls still blindfolded- and lost any chance he had. The stupid starter never gave the jockey time to remove the hood.
