Sheldon Bateau

I work for a newspaper in Caribbean and there is a massive talk going around that our center back Sheldon Bateau is on his way to Newcastle pending work permit approval. Anyone has any info on this ? McClaren tried to sign Sheldon some years ago at Fc Twente and is keen having part of the squad. We are very excited about this, hopefully it goes through he has been an exciting talent for a long time here. Sheldon and his current club in Belgium have had disagreements all this summer about him leaving the club.

 

Lisa - thanks for the info. Its nice to hear we are being linked to a centre-back. However this probably just means that our owner Mike Ashley is planning on opening his Sports Direct chain in the Caribbean and is hoping this will raise the profile there. With a nickname like Mr Dynamite he will be worth the money even if he spontaneously explodes next to one of our existing centre-backs.
I would assume however it is a swap deal. Our centre back Mike Williamson will be able to make the most of his talents on the beaches there - providing rides for small children.

 

Lisa - apologies if that last post all seemed a bit cryptic but believe me its nothing compared to what you will be hit with once some of our other posters wake up. Suffice to say that we have been struggling for centre backs for the last few seasons and everyone on here is desperate for us to strengthen there before the end of the transfer window at the end of this month. Any new players coming in who would hopefully push Mike Williamson further down the pecking order would be welcomed. We do also seem to have a thing about defenders from Belgian clubs at the moment as well. Anything your newspaper can do to make this rumour come true will be gratefully welcomed - we might even taking out a regular full page ad on a weekly basis thanking you for your help.

 

Hallelujah a defender.

This is probably untrue if he has any defensive capability whatsoever which from the video it indicates no defending at all.

He appears to prefer drifting into numner ten role.

 

I havent heard of him, but he does look a similar size and mould of Mbemba, Would you say that those comparisons are unfair Lisa?

As Panthro states, id be quite worried about his positioning when his in the opposition box so much, he has only scored 3 in 50 odd.

 

We are signing Sheldon Cooper out of the Big Bang Theory? He will be intelligent but I'm not sure he has the physical attributes.

 

And correct me if i am wrong but is "Bateau" not french for boat? all out french players can jump on the bateau when the ship is sinking!

 

Hello sugar lips

 

Hello Panthro - please don't use my real name on this forum.

 

Looks like he can tackle! Nice clearance off the line to start with in the video as well BUT he seems to be a Sunday league CB:

Manager: Wheres your best position?
Player: I can play CB but fancy myself as a CF...

 

We are never going to sign a centre back who can actually defend, so we might as well buy one who contributes as an extra striker. He looks like a red card waiting to happen in the premier league as well...so we will definitely be in for him.

 

Mr. Dynamite - I figure that's more of a reference to Trinidad & Tobago (TNT) than his explosive footballing capability.

 

Check out the skills baby

 

I quite like the look of this guy, Think he would fit in well alongside Mbemba. A bit physical and will probably have to curb his habit of picking up opponents and throwing them or he could be red-carded as often as Janmaat. Looks good in the air. Not sure about the shoulder spikes - will play havoc with the new home strip.

 

Well at least we will be able to park the boat, oh l mean bus.
Would be great to get some defensive reinforcement, but l don't see this one happening really.