Off Topic Alcoholism

Very brave Surrey.

Some good advice given. Uber Hoop, who appears to have stopped posting sadly, has alluded to conquering this problem in the past. Ubes, if you are watching, your advice may be very helpful for a fellow R.

 

Surrey, you're incredibly brave just to acknowledge your plight here.

There are rehab centres available both here and abroad. I can't speak from personal experience (tee-total) but my friend's son had an addiction to vodka and would consume a bottle a night and became abusive to his family. It unfortunately ended in divorce and the hardest thing to comes terms with was no access to his son. Think about your son whenever you reach for the wine, if nothing else it will help you cut back.

My friend's son finally sought help abroad at a rehab centre (apparently much cheaper); after six month's treatment he has been able to give up the vodka, but most importantly doesn't turn to alcohol when in need, in short he has been to cope and overcome the dependent urge he used to get.

Good luck whatever you decide, I hope it works out for you.

 

All I can do is wish you the best of luck in overcoming your problem. I've known several friends who had various levels of alcoholism, those who admitted it and actively sought help mostly got 'dry' and most have recovered. There is always the 'temptation' and that is the hardest part even years after. You're on the first step to recovery simply admitting it, only you can take it further...

 

I went to a rehab centre in Lowestoft for 6 weeks but would have preferred longer, never considered going abroad but for the money difference may have given me more time, due to finances. As 9's asked your current dependancy would relevant to the extremities you would need to take to try and resolve things. At that point in time I was dependent and and couldn't believe j was sitting down, 1 week, 2 weeks, 3 weeks clean etc, needed a detox to do it but couldn't believe I was actually sober, for a day let alone a month.. If you are at that point of it seeming impossible it's an option, I have had ups and downs since but no where near as bad as it was

 

Can't give you any advice as such, but I have lost 2 friends to alcoholism in the last 7 years. I urge you to seek proper care as soon as possible. Your admission that you have a problem is a huge step, now take the next one and get help, please.

 

Was it really necessary to post a drink icon with "cheers matey"?
What is it with you?

Surrey....................very brave words mate.
You've taken the first step by admitting the problem, now you need to get help mate. Try your GP, who should be able to point you in the right direction.

All the best mate.

 

Only a complete and utter idiot would dare to make a derogatory comment to 'Surryhoop'.
We all have our own ups and downs in life and as members of this forum, the least we can do is band together and be here for a fellow mate.
Any time you want to 'talk' buddy, just post away, were here.
Aussie

 

[QUOTE="surreyhoop, post: 7999984, member: 1016411"Currently on my 3rd bottle of wine but can still type![/QUOTE]

Hope the heads not too sore this morning pal?

I hit the drink years ago when I was going through the divorce process with my 1st wife (thankfully no kids then), and couldn't even sleep without a skinfull. Once I'd realised what road I was heading down I decided to do something about it, and turned to getting fit - I swam 1mile every morning prior to work, cycled 5miles each way to work and back, then a 6mile run when I got home. I was so knackered that I coudn't face drink, and after a couple of weeks my head started to clear, and I started to feel better about myself. I kept this up for 3 months, and didn't touch a drop of alcohol. That was about 18years ago, and now have a "normal" relationship with booze ñ couple of drinks a week, the odd blow-out on nights out.

Am now happily remarried and settled, and hope you can fight your inner demons and end up in as a good a place as me!

All the best pal

 

Hi Surrey,
Firstly Well done on acknowledging the problem and looking for ways to combat it.
As the Son and Son in law of people who've died from alcohol abuse I can speak from bitter experience of how destructive the demon drink can be in a family environment.
My advice would be this, think of your son. The only way for you to have a proper and decent relationship with him as he grows up is to give it up, a life on the booze will only lead to bitterness and resentment from those around you and by seeing how you're facing up to the problem I think you deserve a good outcome from all this.
Remember you're the master of your own destiny, nobody is forcing you to drink so next time you reach for the bottle spare the boy a thought and think about better ways to enrichen your life rather than drowning it all out.
Good luck mate, I hope your future turns out to be everything you want it to be

 

If you are addicted to alcohol then you must not drink, full stop.
Just one drink will lead to another and then another.
You are seeing your life full apart because of your addiction and need to sort yourself out now.
Otherwise you will have nothing left and end up in a nuthouse because of killing to many braincells.
It sounds harsh but alcoholics must not drink, ever.

 

If only it was that simple!

 

Sound advice everyone... I'm going to have a chat with my GP this week. I feel a bit sheepish airing it on here, but had to get it off my chest a bit! Going to try my hardest to lay off the booze..

I blame Harry

 

Good luck mate. I am sure I talk for most of us on here when I say that.

 

Surrey, been down a similar route to you by the sounds of it, divorce (with young children involved), her blaming me for EVERYTHING, drink problems that were way out of control ended me up it some serious mental mind ****s.

I went down the whole AA & CA (despite never having a drug problem) route, in a way it was swapping addiction (the meetings) for another, like someone mentioned with fitness. I think it's difficult because you can't compare where one person is to another, but I found the company, the need to be somwhere and people who understand what crazy **** you do a help. One big thing for me was 'the higher power/god issue', as an atheist I was a touch sceptical but my desire to sort myself out was much more important, and to me the higher power was the help of others, who don't judge as most of them will have done far worse things than you and wouldn't want to judge you anyway.

I often felt a bit of a fraud as I hadn't done anywhere near the journey most had but I could possibly have gone down the same path, but none judged me for that. I ended up going for about 9 months, starting with 4/5 meetings a week then down to 1 or 2 near the end. I never completed the whole 12 step thing but have remained off the booze for over 5 and a half years. I know people in the rooms who has been going for over 30 years, they needed that and fair play to them each persons problem may need a different solution.

I try and restrict my vices as one adiction or problem can easily be replaced with another, the whole adictive personality thing and you can soon see stupid behaviours popping up again, think adictive peoples mind is wired up a little funny.

I would recomend ringing a local AA or CA it doesn't matter adiction is adiction and going along, yeah it will feel pretty unfomtable at first and there will be stuff you don't like, but almost certainly better than the alternative.

For me now I have married again, taken on 2 step children, doing ok at work, have a new house and see my 2 children from the fist marrage twice a week. I don't like to think where I would be without help, I was my own worse enemy and keeping myself away from people who cared was my prison and made things a million times worse.

Good luck on the journey you choose and brave of you to ask for help.

Best wishes and if you want any questions answered just PM me, I'm not on here all that often and might not have the anwers but will help wherever I can

 

Thank you for pointing that out about the icon...it was a genuine error....the cheers matey was a turn of phrase and meant to be friendly, and nothing untoward. Pretty sure Surrey didn't read anything into it! You take great delight in pulling me up on things all the time, what is it with you?

 

Not just him, there are a few on here who seem to have a thing about you, not been able to see why myself, is it some some sort of subliminal control you're exerting on them? All a bit over my head tbh.

 

Perhaps a bit simplistic but try and develop a good addiction to replace it. Become a gymaholic- this has helped a couple of my mates overcome gambling addiction. Not the same thing, I appreciate, but it gave them something to focus on and a 'high' to replace the one they had lost from gambling.

 

Good for you Surrey. Maybe opening up to a bunch of strangers on here has been your equivalent of sitting in an AA circle and saying 'I am an alcoholic'. You've taken the first step, and I hope you succeed in getting yourself straightened out. Do it for your little boy.

 

Cheers, GC. Strange isn't it? oh well.