It's got to be checkout girls at supermarkets saying "do you need help with your packing?" Not being funny...but do I look as if I need help to put a bottle of Chard, some crisps and a some shaving foam into a plastic bag? Yes, it's all to do with ageism. If they ask some 94 year old coffin dodger...they have to ask everyone. Red card. Bullshit. It's got to go in room 101. Serious contributions only please.
Charity street hawkers they are usually pretty 20 something year old lasses , shimmying up to you arms outstretched i get a bet of a hard on , clear my throat and then hear them say something like "heeeey funky guy " "Heeeey nice hair/sunglasses/tattoo" etc then i realise its the street selling bitch who thinks she is trying to attract customers to a club in Ibiza 1994 . I tell them , with a raindrop nestled on my nose that for the fourth time today i arn't interested , and they have the audacity to tell me "i see dozens of people an hour im not able to remember everyone ive spoken to " at this point my pride is hurt , my todger is well floppy and my Sunglasses are in the nearest bin %@£$@%$£
Wire fed garden strimmers. Self feeding my ring piece. Spend more time twisting the twine around the spool than actually strimming, the ratio is probably 10% strimming and 90% titting around with the twine. They can seriously get to f**k.
Re-enactments. Events put on purely to allow Geography teachers, taxation accountants and associated men with beards to cope with their complete social ineptitude by dressing up as a Cavalier and pretending to be dead in a field in Gloucestershire.
Plastic sheds. Sorry Charlie, they are the work of the devil. They're wrong and seem to deceive some people into their true being, which is of course, being a gateway to hell. Placcy sheds and fans thinking about it.
ATM's that swallow your card when you are trying to get money out, then you have to wait days to get a replacement.
Better than ATM's that just don't dispense your money but still take it off your account balance, takes weeks to get your money back. Happened to me twice, one of those times was for a few hundred when I was paying for a new carpet. I still had to get the cash out which left my bank empty and all the bills on direct debit bounced running up a giant wad of bank charges. Thankfully the bank saw sense and took the charges off, as it was their machines fault anyway.
Chuggers (Charity Muggers) Who tell me "it's only £5" When what they actually mean is "it's £5 per month by Direct Debit that we hope you will forget about and leave running for ever because I get 60% of each one I sell and the Charity Staff/Third World Dictator split the rest" Oh, and Banks, because they are all Robbing Bastards.
Yes, banks are thieving bastards. Bankers are bastards. I'm surprised more hasn't been made on here about banker bastards, specially by those who like to bleat on about anything political/economical etc. In fact there's a certain poster on here of whom I'm stunned that they've never gone on a tirade about bankers.
Its not. Its cos the Grocer magazine Grocer 33 reviewing price and customer service in the UKs supermarkets includes that in its scoring system. No offer to help means you're marked down. My nomination would be when media outlets etc describe people such as Harold Shipman as "The UK's worst serial killer". No he isn't, he's the UK's best serial killer. The worst is someone who tries and fails to kill anyone.
1. Men with shaved heads round the side and a ponytail on top. 2. Trying to cross a road the cars on either side of the road are always spaced out just right that when one side of the road is empty the other side of the road is full of traffic. 3. Parents that swear in public at the young children. 4. Mark Lawrenson 5. Philistines 6. Meat and two veg 7. People who argue that Footballers are wimps and rugby players are tough. Who cares.
People who walk along busy pavements with their face in their phone. (Let's face it, more often than not it's a woman.) And while I'm at it, people who yap away on their phones while paying for things at tills. So rude to the staff serving them. Cyclists who ride the wrong way up a one-way street and expect pedestrians to be on the lookout for them rather than looking in the logical direction for traffic.
Your Gas bill with the measurement converted to KWH (kilowatts per hour) a measurement of electricity. The formula to convert it back would make Einstein sweat. It's like getting your water bill in feet and inches.
Vehicles parked on, or half on the footpath so pedestrians and those with wheelchairs or prams can't pass without going on the road.
just a note to anyone not yet contributing to the gene pool - ** please check both ways on a one way street - it may save your life , coz the chances are only an inbicile will be going the wrong way and your soft fleshy body wont stop them
People who pull out of side roads right in front of you as if there's an emergency and they can't wait 5 seconds for you to pass first, making you (and the cars behind) brake to slow right down, but then proceed to drive at 35 on a 50 road with a constant stream of traffic coming the other way so you can't get past safely. If they're going to pull out in front of vehicles they could at least have the decency to accelerate up to the speed limit, or if they plan to potter along far below it they could just wait a few seconds and pull out behind.
