"Sometimes you just have to stand back and admire the tactical genius at work. Take a bow, Ray Wilkins..."
"And waiting for us in the tunnel is our reporter Chris Kamara". "Unbelievable Jeff. I'm joined by the new QPR manager .......... Flyer."
'' And it's the QPR and England captain Ross Barkley that will step up to take the penalty that can make them the Champions League winners of 2018. As he steps up in front of 35,000 R's fans behind the goal here in The Bernabau.... ''
"Great to see the R's No1 supporter here at the ground again. He hasn't missed a match for 20 years and is so knowledgeable on all things QPR and football in general that Swords".
"...and the fourth official signals that they'll be a further six minutes of time added on, which is a damned nuisance as I'm already touching cloth..."
"Mark Hughes really has turned this team around...they will surely end up league champions now..." Or is it not unlikely things...?
"I think it's a Stoke flag, Jeff. I'm not sure. It must be a Stoke flag, mustn't it? No, hold on .... The doctor has finally removed it from Mark Hughes' arse. Unbelievable Jeff. It's a QPR flag with the words 'gotcha -with love from R Block' written across it!"