The Perfect Signing 01

Today I start a seminar (you know I bring the class to this board) in a long series of seminars designed to find our perfect signing... Through a process of some very serious and well thought out debates, we will ascertain the perfect type of player to sign (culminating in me providing options based on our collective voting), so Joe Kinnear can ignore us and sign someone cheap, smelly, and old enough to be AB's pet dinosaur.

So, to the polls, should our next signing be short, average height, or tall?

 

Your use of the word midget is very un PC. I don't think you realise how hurtful using such phrases can be.

Anyway I want a midget for my amusement.

 

Actually you've got me thinking now. The word midget is considered offensive. I assume because of it being linked to the circus freak shows. Yet the phrase we are told to use is "little people". Is that not just as demeaning in some ways? i.e. it suggests they are less than a full sized person.

At least with midget you are linked to precious gems and nice childhood memories. Apart from the liquorice ones. Not that I am singling out blacks. Damn this complicated world!

 

Why don't you just start a topic "we should sign Lacina Traore" and be done with it?

 

Our next signing should be 6ft 1in and called Loic Remy.

 

this

 

I've gone for a short bloke because I want some hard as nails bastard in the midfield who is about five feet tall, has a thing about his height and is about four feet wide. I would have said evil bastard to be from the Balkans and will stand up to anyone coming his way and will take the game by the scruff of the neck and also bring the rest of the lily-livered wasters back into the match when the chips are down.

And that he can play football too.

 

I like this idea. Small man syndrome is the solution to our problems. Batty, Makelele, Bremner, all little horrible bastards with a chip on their shoulder.

 

well we know we can't call them dwarfs... Have you ever seen one attempt to carry a battle-axe? Hilarious.

Little people is a bit fairy-esque (I don't mean homosexual... God it's a minefield) and makes me feel they live under bridges, horde teeth and hide their gold at the end of a rainbow. Due to underlying bone-conditions, the only teeth they'll be collecting are their own, they couldn't take the damp under bridges, and it'd take about twelve of them to move a pot of gold...



I'm going to get banned, aren't I?

 

Banned? Of course not.I don't know why I felt the need to make this post smaller as I typed.I'm just a bit bored.Do you like the start of the post more than the end?If you do I believe you are a bit sizeist.Which is not very nice.

 

I'll save you some time: Cristiano Ronaldo.

 

Evening Joker

 

Hello

(puts on red wig)

 

Thank you darling.

 

Well at the moment we appear to be in consensus to go for a tall midget???

 

one of them "short midgets" would be spot on.

 

This

 

Looks like Poyet is about to make his first signing for our neighbour's.

Just had a quick look over there and found this.


Gus Poyet wants to make it a family affair at the Stadium of Light by making son Diego his first signing as Sunderland manager.

Poyet was confirmed as the new Black Cats boss on Tuesday – signing a two-year deal to replace Paolo Di Canio.

The former Brighton boss inherits a squad that is bottom of the Premier League and short on confidence, but he will have £30million to spend in January to turn it around.

And Poyet is already plotting who he wants to buy – with his son Diego Poyet a top target.
The youngster is a midfielder at Championship side Charlton, where he is regarded as a star for the future.

Arsenal and Manchester United have previously tried to sign him, but Poyet junior now looks set to link up with his father in the north East.

According to reports, Sunderland will make a £2million bid to lure him away from Charlton, with the opportunity to work with his dad likely to prove too tough to turn down.

Diego, who has been compared to Cesc Fabregas, is an England Under-18 regular and has already vowed to snub approaches from Uruguay to continue his Three Lions career.

Looks like he could be Sunderland's perfect signing.

 

A 6ft 6ins 'midget' (well you should see his big brother), ginger haired, hot-headed, brick house, who has great ball control with both feet, is super fast, brilliant in the air, can shoot accurately from 80 yards out, run his socks off every game type of player.

 

Sounds like a description of yourself Obi.