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Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by good kop red kop, Sep 25, 2013.

  1. good kop red kop

    good kop red kop Active Member

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    Di Canio regains control of Sunderland in military coup

    24-09-13


    PAOLO Di Canio has declared himself Sunderland manager-for-life following a brutal coup.

    The time for diplomacy is over

    The charismatic manager, who was fired for poor results on Sunday, stormed the Stadium of Light with tanks and helicopters before making an impassioned address on the club’s YouTube channel.

    He said: “It takes time to turn a club around and the players I have purchased this summer deserve a chance to settle in. That is why I have seized this club by force and have ordered a reel of piano wire for my talks with senior players.

    “No longer will this club operate under the communist rule of the FA. Where is the logic in winning a war and leaving your opponents to fight another day, or letting a player leave who then comes back to score against you with his unbroken legs?

    “Twelve points have been stolen from us this season. The communists might settle for the loss of three points to West Bromwich Albion, but I say no! I say we must take those points back!

    “To this end I have authorised a low-level bombing raid on the Hawthorns, to be followed by a lightning strike by our infantry led by Lee Cattermole.”

    Fans gathered around Sunderland’s ground were thought to have hung effigies of chairman Ellis Short and caretaker manager Kevin Ball from lampposts, until it became apparent that they weren’t effigies.

    Peterborough United, Sunderland’s opponents in last night’s League Cup game, have confirmed they received a fax from Di Canio requesting their unconditional surrender.

    <peacedove><peacedove><peacedove>In peace! GKRK
     
    #1
    good kop red kop, Sep 25, 2013
  2. froggy1973

    froggy1973 Well-Known Member

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    Fantastic!
     
    #2
    froggy1973, Sep 25, 2013
  3. FTM1973

    FTM1973 Active Member

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    :emoticon-0116-evilg
     
    #3
    FTM1973, Sep 25, 2013
  4. Cest Advocaat

    Cest Advocaat Well-Known Member

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    Very good
     
    #4
    Cest Advocaat, Sep 25, 2013
  5. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Good effort marra..<ok>
     
    #5
    MrRAWhite, Sep 25, 2013
  6. Brian Storm

    Brian Storm Well-Known Member

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    So we're calling him a fascist ourselves now?(or at least condoning it) A week ago a post of this nature would have been met with total disdain. <doh>
     
    #6
    Brian Storm, Sep 25, 2013
  7. marcusblackcat

    marcusblackcat SAFC Sheriff
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    Just a bit of fun I reckon mate - and the OP's a Liverpool fan!

    Very good OP - like a bit of fun in these situations
     
    #7
    marcusblackcat, Sep 25, 2013
  8. Brian Storm

    Brian Storm Well-Known Member

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    I'm up for a laugh, had a good go on the if Paolo was a Mod thread. Up to you lot, I've more self respect than to show myself up as fickle for a cheap laugh.
     
    #8
    Brian Storm, Sep 25, 2013
  9. talcnturnip

    talcnturnip Well-Known Member

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    Very funny mate where'd you nick it from?
     
    #9
    talcnturnip, Sep 25, 2013
  10. Shameless

    Shameless Well hung member

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    Brilliant!
     
    #10
    Shameless, Sep 25, 2013

  11. good kop red kop

    good kop red kop Active Member

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    Appreciate the good response. It's from The Daily Mash. Don't worry, we got ripped to shreds about the Suarez debacle earlier in the year. Good luck with the rest of the year (after this weekend, at least...)

    GKRK
     
    #11
    good kop red kop, Sep 25, 2013

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