The ferry had no longer left Dover and our crowd was attracting attention. The Card school had gone straight in the casino and Vetch immediately won 5000 euros after placing all his cash on black. Suddenly he has 35 friends. SA9 took the glossy mag lads in search of an on board strip club, but having failed to find one offered £500 to Poshminx to do a turn. After thinking about it, she declined and the lads then turned their attention to random female passengers. There was a bit of a mystery as to the whereabouts of FFS, taffthefish and the new recruits and Dill was starting to get worried. He arranged a search party of Dai, Valleygraduate, nicewelshlumberkack, pinball and billybjack to arrange a search of the ship – each taking a separate deck. After a brief and fruitless search they report back to Dill in the bar who is now on his 17th pint. “No luck Dill. I think we may have to tell the skipper” said Dai. “Hold fire” said Dill “wait till we get closer to France”. There was a bit of a scuffle on the top deck and the naval provost were called after Mr Gullible propositioned a smart mature lady. Unfortunately for him it was the Captains wife and he found himself hauled into a cell on the lower deck for the rest of the journey. It wasn’t long before we approach the French coast and now Dill is very concerned. “Can I have another pint?” “Forget that” said Dai “what about FFS?”. “We’d better take another look” grumbled Dill. He walked out onto the deck and suddenly heard a whimper. “FFS, is that you?” No reply. He heard the whimper again. He walked forwards and raised a canopy. To his amazement taffthefish and the new recruits were there looking panicked. They were still stark bullock naked and tied to the anchor, about to be cast in to the sea as we docked. Dill raised the alarm and managed to get them freed, just as we docked. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, but there was still the problem that none of them had any clothes. Some of the new recruits managed to get navy outfits from some of the crew, while taffthefish had to put up with a three quarter length dress from the captains wife. (He looked quite smart if the truth be known). We bundled onto the bus. Mr Gullible and FFS were missing. Vetch had to go and pay 1000 euros to release Mr G from his cell, while we had to leave the port with FFS awol. He was Lost in France. We alerted Interpol. Once in France we made rapid progress. We travelled through Gent and Antwerp and headed to our first overnight stop at a place called Munster, 20 miles north of Dortmund. We rolled into town and drove up the main street to look for our Travelodge. We soon arrived and Dill went in to the hotel to check us all in. Five minutes later he got on the bus, ashen faced. I had never seen Dill like that so I knew something was up. “Theres’s a bit of a problem with the accommodation lads. I booked 50 places in the Travelodge in Munster as we all agreed. But I’ve booked the Munster in ****.ing Ireland. Whats worse, all the local hotels are full” There was uproar. Dill was chased off the bus and he headed into the local bar for refuge. Things soon settled down after the initial panic and we had a brief committee meeting. There was only one thing for it. The driver would have to have a nights sleep (his accommodation had been arranged separately), while the rest of us would have to spend the night on the town in Munster, Germany. So there we were. 49 blokes and Minxy on the loose in Munster. The new recruits in Navy gear and taffthefish in a fetching dress. This could be a long night. NB. Terror is 4-3 up as Ivor makes a fightback. Phil has been called in to referee as things are starting to get too serious.
Top one again PGF, you don't suppose FFS has run off with Minxy. Oh and I'm not bloody sharing with Dilli, did that last time and the bugger kept cuddling me.
Don't you start, I'm tiping off customs on the way back, you might get stripped serched. Saying that why the hell wan't the stop of in Holland!!! they have the best evening's entertainment, and we could have checked out some new dancers for The Hinge!!! Can we make a stop off on the way back???
I'm not going any further without FFS - Dai agrees with me so that probably means he's leaving right away. Hey Glam - was your dog just here or is that really a pretzel on the floor?
Alright lads anyone fancy a Rissole? I was going to see if there were any spare seats and visited Rossi's before coming over to the bus, noticed the driver had left a luggage door open and decided to stow away
