Illogical Personal Conclusions

You know how you see someone on the telly and you draw a non-logic based conclusion about them?

Is that normal?

Every time I see Nigel Farage on the telly, I always think he looks like he's got a really wee willy.

There was a singer in a band called A Hundred Reasons and I used to think he looked like he had smelly feet.

...and I always imagined Richard Griffiths to have loads of bedsores and a nappy rash.

 

Matthew Kelly stinks of stale pish.

 

Robert Palmer likes to strangle women

 

Moira Stuart has an extremely hairy bush

 

You can bet your bottom dollar that the current raft of newsreaders are shorn to the wood.

...apart from Sophie Raworth who thinks it's a mummy's correct place to own a pant afro.

 

Jonathan Woss has a fanny.

 

Bruce Forsyth has a sex dungeon behind a revolving wall in his bedroom called 'Le Chambre'.

 

John Noakes and Shep were in the underground bestiality scene

 

Weather girl Carol Kirkwood has love eggs up her **** when she's on live, that's why she always appears to be happy

Ah wid

 

Fiona Bruce's **** looks like this.

please log in to view this image

 

Ah wid also

I'd go so far as to possibly call them telly's premium set of mumsy bangers.

 

Mindyfail

 

Lenny Henry refuses to go down unless she's a whitey.

 

Stephen Hawking's catheter keeps falling out.

 

Mick Hucknall collects his own blackhead outputs and smokes the legs of flamingoes.

 

Gordon Strachan has a tiny penis and no pubic growth

 

I am constantly in a state of Rage.

 

Ted Rodgers makes his own booze and sells it off a market stall.

 

Maggie Philbin has klinkers the size of Mangoes

 

My da met him at a holiday camp when he was stocious and called yer man Rodgers "a big ****ter"