That was unlucky, but don't fret - My thoughts on the game

I feel so ****ing sorry for Cisse, because everyone will just be focusing on his missed chances, when really he should have had at least one goal but the linesman was being a **** and ****ed us over.

However, all we need to do is get an away goal vs Metalist and hold them down to 0 or 1 goals and we're through. At least they didn't get a goal themselves.

If we score then the pressure is all on them.

Ratings -

Krul -7 - A great save early on to deny them, and some good punches and claims.

Mbiwa - 7.5 - He did well today considering that he was out of his natural position. He has good pace for a CB, so I suppose he can be used as a makeshift fullback. Good reading of the game, good challenges, good ability on the ground. Can't wait to see him more involved.

Colo - 7.5 - Some sexual play on the ground. Good game.

Saylor - 8 - SOLID! That's all I need to say. The bloke always plays well.

Santon - 7.5 - Good work going forward and decent defending.

Cabaye - 7.5 - Great defensive work rate, and great passing.

Tiote - 7 - Some stupid errors. He didn't need to body check the bloke for the yellow, but I guess we can't blame him entirely. We were caught on the break and it was no different to what Jonas did when he pulled that bloke down. He made some good tackles and played well.

Sissoko - 7.5 - A little bit off at times, but his runs with the ball were beast, great skill and good work. He was a thorn in their side, but credit to them, they seemed to have a decent plan together to deal with the lad.

Jonas - 7 - **** crossing, but good work rate and good defending.

Obertan - 6.5 - **** crossing, but he played a superb pass to set off the move to what should have been our first goal. I thought he did well first half, good work.

Cisse - 7 - Unlucky as hell. I haven't seen the decision for the 2nd goal but it was a fantastic finish. This match could have really boosted his confidence, but he was dead unlucky with decisions.

Marv - 7.5 - Fantastic impact sub, he raped Metalist's midfield.

Shola - 6.5 - Typical Shola. Utter ****e and Utter brilliance within minutes of each other. He almost set up a goal with a great knock down, but it wouldn't lie for Cisse. He skinned a few players and made decent good impact.

MOTM - Saylor for me. Nothing fancy, just good solid defending. Saved us a couple of times.

Overall - **** the linesman. Fat ****ing ****.

 

Why "don't fret" though Tash? Yes we kept a clean sheet, which at home is a priority. BUT, I think we'll be turned over at their place. Sorry!

 

Krul -8 - Very good save first half. My MOTM because the rest of them looked pretty half-asked.

Mbiwa - 6 - Decent(ish). Not good in the air, pretty weak, but pretty good with ball at feet. Feel sorry for him playing RB.

Colo - 6 - Ok.

Saylor - 7 - Solid again.

Santon - 3 - Horrible performance. Was caught out numerous times, gave the ball away lots and his crossing was bloody awful tonight. Him and Jonas DO NOT WORK together.

Cabaye - 5 - Passable for a workman like performance.

Tiote - 5 - Again, workman like, but lacking quality.

Sissoko - 6 - Occasional quality lift him out of what really is a turgid mire tonight.

Jonas - 3 - Like Santon, he was utter ****. His decent dribbling near the end save a minus score. It's horrifying seeing a flank the Toon have been blessed with over the years, be absolutely ashamed by two players who are so incompatible, and so incapable of putting in a decent cross when they're next to each other.

Obertan - 4 - Mostly **** again from Obertan. Fast, but it's so frustrating having two wingers who produce very little for forwards.

Cisse - 1 - Should have scored a few, his touch was terrible tonight. His decent finish for the second save the lowest score I could possibly give out, -369, but he was still cack.

Marv - 7 - Tried to force the issue, received precious little support.

Shola - 4 - Oh Shola... Shola Shola Shola...

 

Were you two at the same match?

If I'm ever in a reality show contest, I want Tash to be judging me.
If I see Gandalf I am NOT going out on stage. Simples!

 

Well my Romanian transsexual "talent show" is too good for you anyway

 

Hang on, I didn't know there was a Romanian transsexual contest. Where do I sign up?

 

I'll refer you to my honourable colleague AB, who checks that everything is... in working order... Well, it doesn't have to be working, but that's going to make the egg and "spoon" race challenge really tricky...

 

Thanks for the advice. I like spooning. I like forking too.

 

Poor game, very disappointed with it and our performance was like chalk and cheese compared to the Chelsea game.

The one good thing was having Saylor back, he put in a good performance.

Plus Sandra was right, Tim does need something doing to his hair.

 

Krul 7- Had **** all to do. Kicking ****e as usual.

Mbiwa 7- Looks a cracking player, strong defensively, very quick and looks very comfortably with the ball at his feet, will be a fine replacement for Coloccini when he does off in the summer IMO.

Taylor 7- Didn't put a foot wrong, absolutely solid from where I was sitting.

Coloccini 6- Looked very suspect and even his usual great first touch and passing looked shaky.

Santon 5- Thought he was actually not bad going forward but again he was suspect defensively, every attack of theirs in the first half was down his side as he stood watching cluelessly, Colo was looking after two men constantly.

Obertan 6- Decent really, made some good runs and looked like he wanted to run at players, would have liked him to stay on longer with the opposition tiring.

Cabaye 6- Played some exquisite passes and put in a shift defensively but feel he was bullied at CM by much poorer players.

Tiote 5- This bloke just becomes more of a concern as each game passes, the game is just passing him by, rarely makes interceptions and when he does they are late and clumsy, could have walked for a second booking offence that the ref missed on the halfway line, would prefer Perch or Bigi at this moment in time, should not have just walked back into the team like that.

Sissoko 7- Another impressive display, every good move we had went through him, hes going to be absolutely massive for us for the rest of this and next season.

Gutierrez 6- Worked very hard, not only that he managed to look a bit more like the Jonas of old, skipped past players leading us into advanced positions, would be 7 but his final ball is still as shocking as ever.

Cisse 5- Was denied a perfectly legitimate goal but to be fair he didn't even take that well, poor finishing which has summed up his season was real disappointment though, just isn't the player we thought he was unfortunately. His second goal was definitely offside, however marginal.

Marveaux 5- As usual when introduced as a sub he failed to make much of an impact, highly over rated by most of our fans in my opinion.

Ameobi 1- Its like playing with 10 men.



All in all I think the battle was lost in central midfield which is baffling when you consider the on paper quality we have in there. They bossed the centre of the pitch IMO which stifled the majority of our penetrative forward play. They certainly gave us a game and I'm not too optimistic for the away leg.

 

Howdy, haven't seen you posting for a while.

 

Hello, yes been posting on another forum (traitor) but decided to pop back in a bit more, been missing the place.

Have I missed much?

 

No, no. Not a thing. Nothing at all.

 

Bet Tash has been banned about 232328238232329 times since my last visit.

 

Welcome back rep!

 

Welcome back rep!

 

He's done something else that many times too, but we don't talk about that on here. Never!

 

The linesman on the Milburn Stand and the ref must need to go to Specsavers, they missed lots of calls that we should have had.

At the end of the day though Metalist played like they wanted it more than us.

The guy that came on the field wasn't the streaker from the last Euro game was he?

 

You came close to mentioning the Sea of Slime there Obi.

 

At the end of the day, a 1-1 draw at Metalist will see us through to the next round.