The true reason the USA so dramatically snatched defeat from the jaws of victory this year has finally come to light. After a lengthy investigation by the PGA of America and USGA, in which they promised to leave no stone unturned, it was discovered that defeat was down to the equipment. On the final day, it has been discovered that Team USA used a completely different set of non-regulation balls. The origin of these balls is unclear, although they have SAFC emblazoned upon them. It has also been confirmed that they are actually rolled up pieces of paper. How these balls came to replace the actual ones remains a mystery, although the SAFC written on them led the investigations to a football team in the North East of England. SAFC denied any involvement in this sporting sabotage, citing that they were too busy smearing poo around local toilet facilities during the Ryder Cup.
