Off Topic The 'Like' Brothel

please log in to view this image

 

please log in to view this image

 

My job search:

My first job was working in an orange juice factory but I got canned. I couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack but I just couldn't hack it so they gave me the axe. After that , I tried being a tailor but I wasn't suited for it.. mainly because it was a sew-sew job. Next, I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting. Then I tried being a chef. I figured it would add a little spice to my life but I just didn't have the thyme. Next I attempted being a deli worker but any way I sliced it, I just couldn't cut the mustard. My best job was a musician but I wasn't noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor but I had no patients. Next I had a job in a shoe factory but no matter how hard I tried, I just didn't fit in. I became a professional fisherman but I discovered I couldn't live on my net income. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company but the work was too draining. So then I got a job in a workout center but they said I wasn't fit for the job. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.

 

liked you up before you go go Kiwi. hope all is good fella!

 

and

 

morning

 

to

 

all

 

All good here acs
Bloody cold though
Can't wait for global warming to kick in

 

what's the temp in NZ?

 

13 degrees here at the moment

 

A lorry carrying 20 tons of onions has overturned on the M25 motorway.

Motorists are looking for a hard shoulder to cry on....

 

WTF is an acronym ….

 

So I was pulled over by a police car today. The officer asked, "Do you know why I've pulled you over sir?"
"No officer," I replied.
"Well," he said, "This doesn't happen very often, but I've been following you for the last ten or so miles and your driving is exemplary. Correct road positioning, perfect observation and due regard for other road users".
"Thanks," I said, "So you reckon it's worth me getting a licence then officer?"

 

So what they should really say on those daytime cooking shows:

"Hello and welcome to 'pointless cooking that has nothing to do with anyone's actual life'. Today, we are making a very complicated recipe, using ingredients you don't have, utensils you've never heard of, and in a kitchen that is bigger than your whole house!!"

 

A local man has been admitted to hospital with a golf ball lodged in his bottom.

His wife said its gone up a fairway.

 

please log in to view this image

 

please log in to view this image

 

please log in to view this image

 

please log in to view this image