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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #36841
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 2:21 PM
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Despite getting A.B.B.A. in my recent exam results, no employer will take a chance on me.....
     
    #36842
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 2:35 PM
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My mate was a Kleptomaniac and a sex pest. He went around pinching peoples bums
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    #36843
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 2:40 PM
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    "Fire in the hole!" I shouted.

    As I picked up the Deep Heat instead of Anusol
     
    #36844
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 3:40 PM
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I wonder if songbirds get mad at hummingbirds for not knowing the words.....
     
    #36845
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 3:49 PM
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    If you want your old fridge taken away by the council fast and free. Paint the English flag on it and it will be gone with in the day!.. follow me for more pro tips.....
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    #36846
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 4:03 PM
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Little known fact!

    Richard Gere’s dad was Gottler, a Swedish ventriloquist.....
     
    #36847
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 4:11 PM
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    They scoffed when I told them one day I would learn the secret of invisibility...

    If only they could see me now!
     
    #36848
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 4:16 PM
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My local butcher asked if I would like some cured ham.

    I said, "Frankly I'd like some that hasn't been ill in the first place".
     
    #36849
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 4:30 PM
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    VW have just launched an electric vehicle for Yorkshire people.

    They have called it the E-Up !
     
    #36850
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 5:27 PM

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #36851
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 22, 2025 at 5:33 PM
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