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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Just got hospitalized due to a peekaboo accident.

    They put me in the ICU.
     
    #36581
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 25, 2025 at 11:18 PM
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36582
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 25, 2025 at 11:19 PM
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    I finally got to see a doctor today.
    I went and spoke to them on the picket line
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    #36583
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 26, 2025 at 10:01 PM
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    I said to my wife: "When I die l'd like to die having sex."

    She replied: "At least it'll be quick."
     
    #36584
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 26, 2025 at 10:13 PM
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36585
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 26, 2025 at 10:22 PM
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    The Pubs are allowed to stay open until 1am on Sunday night for the Women's Euros final, and 6am if it goes to Penalties.
     
    #36586
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 26, 2025 at 10:41 PM
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    An electrician didn't get home until after 2am. His wife asked: "Wire you insulate?"

    He replied: “Watts it to you, don’t be so negative, wire you blowing a fuse? I'm ohm, aren't I?" I suppose I’m grounded now!!”
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    #36587
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 28, 2025 at 5:02 PM
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36588
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 28, 2025 at 5:26 PM
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36589
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 28, 2025 at 5:31 PM
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36590
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 28, 2025 at 6:16 PM
  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #36591
    Wooperts_duck, Jul 28, 2025 at 6:45 PM
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