Our local greengrocers is called Mamas 'n' Papas.... I bought a head of lettuce from there the other day but couldn't eat it as all the leaves were brown......
And to think! People actually wondered how a couple of Ukrainian rent boys knew where #TwoTierKeir lives and, what car he drove! please log in to view this image
Naked A beautiful young woman very liberated, walks into a bar completely naked. She stands in front of the bartender and says "Serve me a cold beer!" The bartender serves her the beer and stares at her, not moving. "What wrong?" she says "Have you ever seen a naked woman?" "Yes, many times!" the bartender replies Then what do you look? the woman asks. "I want to see where you're going to get the money to pay for beer!"
I have learned that if you upset your wife, she nags you, but if you upset her even more, you get the silent treatment. Does anyone else think it's worth the extra effort?
Flight Fact: Ryanair have won ‘the most unpopular airline’ trophy 6 years in a row. If they win it again next year, they'll break the record set by the Luftwaffe !
A woman couldn't keep a boyfriend so she went to the doctor and told him. He said strip off and stand away with your back to the wall. She did this then he said, 'Now bend over and look at me through your legs. She did this and he said, 'You've got Zacharies disease' She said 'What's that' He said, 'Your face look Zachary like your arse'
So a fella walks into a pub with a biscuit tin and a mouse. He says to the barman: "Watch this". He sticks the mouse on top of the biscuit tin and it starts dancing. The barman says: "Blimey, how long does he dance for?" "As long as you like," said the fella. "I’ll give you £50 for it" says the barman. "Sold," said the fella. That night the fella gets a call from the barman. "How do we stop the mouse dancing, the tapping is driving us mad?" The fella says: "Lift the lid off the biscuit tin and blow out the candle".
