A Cadburys lorry and a Lego lorry have crashed on the M25 motorway this morning. Police say that the road is choc a block.
I got a job as a bin man and I asked the boss if I would receive any training. He said "No . . . . you'll just pick it up as you go along."
"F*ck the f*cking lot of you. You're all a bunch of c*nts." My acceptance speech at the Tourette's Awards was met with warm applause.