I’m needing to disentangle this club from my life somewhat. When we win a game, I read every report,, read the threads on here, read the opponents forums, listen to all the podcasts, watch the club videos, look at the league table and look at the fixtures ahead. When we lose I just want to shut the world down until the next game. I’m irritable and it impacts my home life. Even reading the reports of unrest at the club today, financial messes, never mind the prospect of relegation and it has me feeling down further. I’ve got to the point, I need to care less about this club as it’s doing me no favours. I’m not sure how I’m going to do it but it’s something I need to do. I just needed to write this down on here to start the process.
Choose a non-league second team and start enjoying watching football again, Willy. That would be my suggestion. I spend some of my time in Greece and in the last two or three years have started supporting the local team there (who’ve been doing well, so it’s an excellent antidote). But I also occasionally watch National League South games which can be fun (although Hampton and Richmond at the moment are almost as depressing as the Tigers).
Can relate. I've been a bit more active than usual as of lately, but felt a bit similar. Should probably take a "break" again. I removed not606 as shortcut in the the task bar (or whatever it's called in English). Found myself reading just for the sake of it, got tired of all the toxicity and pointless arguments, so removed it. Feel that I'm more productive without it I watched the Derby game with a mate and it completely shot my mood for the rest of the evening. And this is probably enough of a warning sign.... "Gotta check what they think, same pessimism? " etc etc
Outside of football what else do you put your time into? As harsh as it sounds for me I used to be the exact same and have scintillating losses of control on this forum/X, my only real hobby outside of a few token gym sessions a week was footy and getting hammered (dont get me wrong I still love both of those things lol) but as I’ve grown older I got bang into combat sports, surfing and learning languages, this has been couple with marked improvements in my career and seeing doors opening up in Europe. Once I started to see the benefits of true discipline and investment into myself I now no longer get upset about football what so ever, I love watching with my friends, family etc and having a few beers so when I do find time to do it it’s a true pleasure and relaxation. a good mantra for anything is if it is out of your control then do not let it get to you, this all depends on other men’s efforts and achievements none of us can have any real impact so relax, enjoy the ride and try to find something new alongside footy to put time into?
Thanks for that reply NJ - I definitely see the benefits of widening my interests. Work and young family seem to take up all of my time but I think that’s an illusion I’ve created for myself and really could find the time if I just stopped ‘running on the treadmill’ and just made time for other things. It’s got me thinking anyway
You’re a man doing his best to provide and stay healthy for his young family, don’t beat yourself up too much about getting too involved, escapism is key in this modern world Willy. I will caveat though that I’m at a stage in life where I don’t have that responsibility yet which obviously takes up a lot of time but yeah… find something you’ve always wanted to do, mental or physical but something that requires an element of challenge to improve at or something that makes you a bit nervous. I found languages for example did loads for my mental health as I haven’t properly applied my brain to learn something in years, it’s been a magical experience and when I met my girlfriends parents (southern Italian no English) I was terrified but could actually manage to speak to them it was very rewarding and lit the fire further. If you’re tread-milling and not enjoying it it becomes awfully boring doesn’t it, I can’t bloody stand running but if I’m engaged in sport it’s a completely different kettle of fish plus the community aspect is a cracking side effect of it. (EDIT: Had a thought on the bog that escapism comment is the key, that’s what football is and why I think I’ve grown to enjoy it a lot more in a more balanced way, it’s something to enjoy and if it gets too much I remember it’s a tool to escape from the true pressures in life and not a source of it, that helps)
Some great comments which I agree with, I’ve found since my mum died I don’t care as much or as deeply about City , I get it’s important to some , but I’d happily accept us been in national conference , if I could go for tea at my mums again and moan to my dad about the game . There’s more much more worthy things to get stressed over than football
One thing is for sure and that’s sharing (even if with a bunch of strangers in a forum) does help. Heading home to sit in the sun with a coffee to contemplate.
This has reminded me , I registered with one of the mental health talk things after discussions on here, was told I’d get a phone call back within 65 days, 78 days ago . As it goes I feel a lot better anyway but I can see why people struggle when really relying on help .
