Should have accepted your participation trophy, you failed nepo baby please log in to view this image
I'm going to presume that Mar a Lago has toasters on the go 24/7 so they can explain to one resident why he keeps saying he can smell burning toast please log in to view this image
Someone said that it's his tell that he's lying when he does accordion hands. The problem is that he does both constantly.
Michael Gove is to be given a peerage in Rishi Sunak's resignation honours. Baron of Bogota and Aberdeenshire, perhaps?
A teacher in Florida (where else?) has been sacked for using a pupil's preferred name, after their parents kicked up a stink What this has brought up is that the writing of this utter chucklefuckheaded law is so strict that if a child is named Robert but prefers to be called Bobby, the teacher has to ask the kid's parent for permission to call them Bobby even though literally everyone in the class would call them Bobby otherwise they risk being fired Of course, isn't it funny this law somehow does not apply to Rafael Edward Cruz, as people have called him by his preferred name for years and not one person has lost their job for it...?
How are people supposed to refer to their VP, then? JD Vance? James Bowman? James David Hamel? Twatface?
It'd be a bloody minefield over here too, considering the preferred names have been used for the likes of Alex de Pfeffel Johnson, James Brown, Gideon Osborne, Mary Truss, Sue-Ellen Fernandes et al And that's before Timothy Davie, Wesley Streeting, Elizabeth Kendall, Joanne Swinson, John Cable, Edward Miliband, Akwasi Kwarteng...
Two more aviation accidents in the last 12 hours: first a pair of planes clipped each other's wings at Reagan airport in DC, one of them with members of Congress on board, and then in New York a tourist helicopter plunged into the Hudson river killing all six onboard That's more aviation accidents in the US since January 20th than at this point in any of the past five years
Things you don't want to hear when your plane is at 20,000 feet: "Hey, wanna see my impression of the stock market?"
Trump's Edumacational Secretary (who turned a blind eye to years of her husband's sex crimes) Linda McMahon says she wants A1 in classes as early as kindergarten She meant to say AI...
Because in these times it's easy to forget we have our own ****wits ruining things for everybody, Bad Enoch's been forced to admit she lied about negotiating a modernisation plan with British Steel to save the Scunthorpe steel plant when she was Business Secretary Bet she's thankful the Tories changed the rules about No Confidence letters post-Truss, stating you cannot send one in until the Leader has been in place for twelve months ...and a large part of why they're under threat of losing their jobs is because Tricky Dickhead threatened the site with a rent hike while he was pontificating how important it was the plant be saved
