A tad naughty - Paddy is 85 and lives in a Senior Citizens Home. Every night after dinner he goes to a secluded garden behind the home to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life. One evening, Mary, age 82, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed. After a short lull in their conversation, Paddy turns to Mary and asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?" She asks, "What?'' "Sex." he replies. Mary exclaims, "Why you old toot. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!" "I know," says Paddy, "but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while." "Well, I can oblige," says Mary, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mary would hold Paddy's thingie. Then one night Paddy didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, Mary decided to find him and make sure he was O.K. She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Paddy's's little pal! Furious, Mary yelled, "You two-timing son-of-a-gun!! What does Ethel have that I don't have?" Old Paddy smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's"
Aye, but we walked down Havelock Rd to St Luke’s Rd then across the gardens where the horses were tied up.
There's a woman coming into our office on Monday to talk about sexual harrassment in the workplace . . . . we're hoping that she's got big tits !
A husband and wife were having dinner at a fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, tells him that she'll see him later, and walks away. His wife glares at him and says, “Who is that ?” “Oh,” replies the husband, “That's my mistress.” The wife says, “That's it . . . . I want a divorce.” “I understand,” replies her husband, “but remember that if we get divorced there will be no more shopping trips to Paris, no wintering in the Caribbean, no Lexus in the garage, and no more country club . . . . but the decision is yours.” Just then the wife notices a mutual friend entering the restaurant with a gorgeous woman on his arm. “Who's that woman with Jim?” she asks. “That's his mistress” replies her husband. The wife says "Oh . . . . ours is prettier.”
