Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Sorry

 

Another owldy but goody

 

"Tree fellers wanted" I'm surprised at you Gordon

 

A bakery owner hires a young female assistant who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties.
One day a young man enters the shop, glances at the assistant and at the loaves of bread behind the counter.

Noticing her short skirt, and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea.
“I’d like some raisin bread please,” the man says.
The assistant nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread located on the very top shelf.
The man standing almost directly beneath her, is provided with an excellent view, just as he thought.
When she descends the ladder, he decides that he had better get two loaves, as he is “having company for dinner.”
As the assistant retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what’s going on and requests his own loaf of raisin bread.

After many trips, she is tired, irritated and begins to wonder “why the unusual interest in the raisin bread?”

Atop the ladder one more time, she looks down and glares at the men standing below.

Then, she notices an elderly man standing in the queue. Thinking that she can save herself a trip, she yells at the elderly man,

Is it raisin for you too?” “No,” stammers the old man, “but it’s quivering a little.”....

 

My wife and I have decided we don't want children.

It was a difficult decision, but we're telling them tonight.

 

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Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman are all going for a job as a code breaker for Scotland yard. Their first test is to pick the odd one out from 3 objects. A cabbage, a potato and a knife.
The Englishman walks in and the interviewer asks him which is the odd one out.
The Englishman replies, “The knife, because the other 2 are vegetables.” He passes the test and is told to send the 2nd man in.
The Scotsman enters and after being asked he also replies, “The knife, because the other 2 are foods.” He passes and is asked to send the Irishman in.
When asked the odd one out he replies, “The cabbage!” The interviewer says, “What, how did you get that answer?”
The Irishman replies, “Well, you can make chips with the other two!"