I'm in big trouble with my wife. She asked me where was I taking her for Christmas. Apparently "Over the coffee table" was not what she wanted to hear.
I'm going out today to get my wife's Xmas present. Does anyone know roughly how many sheet's of wrapping paper you need for an ironing board?
The plane was about to crash - the pilot called out, "Anyone on this plane believe in the power of prayer?" A vicar's hand went straight up. "Thank f*ck for that!" said the pilot. "We're one parachute short."
Banks should do a better job of keeping their ATMs filled . . . . this is the fifth one that I've been to that says "Insufficient funds"
