I was down the pub last night and the barman shouted “does anyone know CPR” I said I know the whole alphabet. My, we all laughed and laughed. Well, apart from this one bloke……
Father and young son go to a horse auction. The young son watches as his father moves from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse’s legs, rump and chest. After a few minutes the son asks “Dad, why are you doing that?” His father replied “Because when I’m buying horses I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.” The son, slightly worried said “Dad, I think the postman wants to buy mum.”
bought tickets for the grandkids to go and see disney on ice.....what a rip off! it was just some dead cartoonist lying in a morgue
Darth Vader spoilt Luke Skywalker's Christmas when he said...Luke I know what you are getting for Christmas, I've felt your presents
When the wife came in from work looking really tired, she said I've had a **** day and need a bit of consoling...so I hit her with the x-box
