Little known fact there is a Patron Saint of checking bread rolls before removing from the oven. Saint John The Bap Test.
My wife and I get horny at different times. Her peak is late at night, and mine is when she goes to work.
"Can I have a coffee please." "A coffee?" he laughed, "Sir, this is Costa so you're going to have to be a bit more specific." "OK. Can I have a coffee please you pretentious condescending c*nt."
BBC breaking news: Women can now serve in ALL roles in the Armed Forces. In other news, all reverse gears from British tanks have been removed.
I was disappointed when I went to a Spoonerism Society lunch where there was supposed to be catering … … it was a complete lack of pies