Just been watching the Amputee's in the Olympics... Did you know Jamaica have gone 23 games without defeet?
I was telling my mate that my wife has a weird habit of licking my balls. He said, " That's not weird. I wish my wife would do that." I said, " I didn't know that you played golf."
Met a girl in the pub last night who said she'd show me a good time... Got outside, she ran 100m in 9.72 seconds....
A husband and wife are at Custody court and the judge looks sternly at the ex wife. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child ?" Ex wife: "I brought him into this world so I should have custody of him." Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason." Then the judge looks towards the ex husband. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir ?" The ex husband thought long and hard about his response, and after a brief moment of silence, he says "If I put money into a Coke machine and a Coke comes out, is it mine or the machine’s ?"
