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Jokes

Discussion in 'Leeds United' started by ellandback, Jun 25, 2019.

  1. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Was this the best sniper the Democrats could trick into taking the job on

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    #9321
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  2. OLOF

    OLOF Well-Known Member

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  3. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Alec Baldwin will volunteer for the gig, he gets let off easy all the time
     
    #9323
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  4. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    I had my prostate checked yesterday.The doctor gave me the thumbs up.
     
    #9324
  5. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Labour management training class



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    #9325
  6. Aski

    Aski Well-Known Member

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    #9326
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  7. Aski

    Aski Well-Known Member

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    #9327
  8. Diego

    Diego Lone Ranger

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    #9328
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  9. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #9329
  10. Aski

    Aski Well-Known Member

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  11. tricky1664

    tricky1664 Well-Known Member

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  12. Old Git

    Old Git Well-Known Member

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  13. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Little April
    Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.
    One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"
    When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
    "God almighty!" shouted April.
    The teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back to sleep.
    A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
    "Jesus Christ!" shouted April.
    The teacher said, "Very good," and April fell back to sleep.
    Then the teacher asked April, "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.
    This time April jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that blo*dy thing in me one more time, I'll break it in two and stick it where the sun don't shine!"
    The teacher decided it would be best to not ask April any more questions.
     
    #9333
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  14. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Mother, father, and son were having dinner, and the son wouldn't eat his sprouts.
    Mother said, "Son, eat your sprouts," but the son refused.
    Father leaned over and whispered in the boy's ear.
    The boy quickly ate his sprouts and went to his room.
    The mother asked, "What did you say to him?"
    Father replied, "I told him his willy wouldn't grow any bigger if he didn't eat them!"
    The mother slapped the father around the head.
    He asked, "What was that for?"
    She replied, "For not eating your sprouts when you were a child."
     
    #9334
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  15. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar.
    After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"
    To which she responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!"
    Everyone in the bar is now staring at them.
    Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.
    After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."
    To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What you have gonorrhea you dirty bitch and you want to charge
     
    #9335
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  16. OLOF

    OLOF Well-Known Member

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  17. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #9337
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  18. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #9338
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  19. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #9339
  20. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #9340

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