A Muslim was sitting next to Paddy on a plane. Paddy odered a whiskey. The stewardess asked the Muslim if he'd like a drink. He replied in disgust 'I'd rather be raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips!' Paddy handed his drink back & said 'Me too, I didn't know we had a choice!'
Little Billy was 9 years old and was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her "Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?" She was a little taken aback, but she decided to tell him the truth. "It's called sexual intercourse, darling." Little Billy said, "Oh, OK," and went back outside to play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it isn't called sexual intercourse. It's called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy's mom wants to talk to you."
I asked my wife to let me know next time she has an orgasm. She said she doesn’t like to bother me when I’m at work.
I'm at the airport and there's a woman completely passed out on the baggage carousel! She's slowly coming around now.
