Off Topic The Goodhand Arms

A man who has just died finds himself standing at the gates of Heaven. To his right is standing an attractive women, and to his left is a ladder. The woman speaks, "Come with me through the gate and spend eternity with me, or climb the ladder to success." The man always eager to get ahead in life chooses to climb the ladder. The man finds an even more beautiful woman standing in front of another gate. Next to her is another ladder. The woman says, "Come with me through the gate and all your fantasies will be granted, or climb the ladder to success." This time the man is tempted, but his greed takes over and he climbs the ladder higher.

He again encounters a woman. This woman, however; is the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. She says, "come with me and I will satisfy your deepest desires forever, or climb the ladder to success." The man can't believe his luck. He decides to take his chances and climbs the ladder. He comes to another gate. This time there is no woman waiting for him. Suddenly an old overweight man walks up to him. "Are you God?" the man asks. "No, I'm Sess."

 

Doc, Jennifer, Marty and Biff in what is now the future.

 

Isn't that Lorraine?.

 

Thought it was Jennifer his girlfriend

 

No It's his mum. Too many heads spoil the joke.

 

Poor Michael

 

There are actually two actresses playing Jennifer. Elisabeth Shue was the second jennifer and they had to re-shoot the beginning of the second film because of the change of actress. There were also two George McFlys.

 

I never knew that

 

Did you know Elijah Wood from The Lord of the rings was in Back to the future 2?

 

You've sent me down a Sunday YouTube rabbit hole....

 

This morning I saw my neighbour talking to her cat; it was obvious the poor women thought the cat understood her.

When I got home I told my dog...we laughed a lot.

 

Apparently, it’s only called a blowjob if you’re a sex worker.



Otherwise, it’s a blowhobby

 

.My mate calls Donkey. He ought he ought he ought to know better.

 

Why are hurricanes mostly named after women?
Because they give you a fantastic blowjob then they f*ck off with half your house.

 

Having decided to get out a bit more this year we've just booked ticket to see Jools Holland at the Paradiso in Amsterdam. Cautionary warning, I bought two tickets direct from the Paradiso for €86 which includes a months membership. Online agencies viagogo, ticketmaster and others charging €65 to €79.

 

The only reason your cat does not kill you and eat you is because you are much bigger than it but jus imagine what it would do if you were only 9" tall.

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