When I left college I went to work on a farm in Bedale, been there 4 months and they decided to get the farm house renovated, when they got a new bathroom door fitted it never had a lock on. Sitting having a crap one day the door opened and the farmers head popped round the door. He says sorry lad didn’t realise you were in so shut the door again. Just as I was wiping my arse the door opened again and his head popped round and had another look then shut the door again. I was gone within a week
I worked at a Slaughter house/bacon factory for 6weeks when i got made redundant in October around 21 years ago and i was desperate for a job to get me through Xmas. They used to take 20 pound a week off us for transport and id get picked up by a bus at 330am to do a 2 hour drive ready for a 6am till 2pm shift and then id get dropped off after work at 5pm, and do it all again the next night. If you didnt get there on time there wouldnt be enough rubber gloves to go round everyone so youd have to spend the day picking Pigs organs up bare hand. I seriously thought about becoming a Vegetarian at one point. The corridors of the factory looked exactly the same as the film Hostel. The local lads hated us for some reason and every time wed pass eachother in the corridors wed stare eachother down. They looked like extras from the Hills have eyes half of them.
You probably won’t believe this but once a month I used to go to the bacon factory at Middlesbrough and I used to saw the snouts off 20 bacon pigs and collect their lungs, I then took them to Rhisolme college to get them analysed for decease. I often used to think what would happen if I crashed and that lot went hurtling through the front window of the car
I did some right rough jobs while at uni. Would do anything during summer holidays to earn something. I did a week in a pet food factory. 12 hour days in the summer. The stench in that place was horrendous. Being the new lad I was on bagging. Holding a 25kg bag under a shute while it filled then stack them pass it down the line. Dust and ****e all day. Go home on the night and took 2 showers and the stink was still in your hair. Got to Saturday and was asked if I wanted to work Sunday and I said bollocks. Got a job with a builder lugging stuff round the next week so never went back.
Went to an agency for some work on days off years ago. Turned down class 1 since it was only about a pound an hour more for a world of ****. Offered me a job taking amputated limbs to incineration from hospitals . Fook that. I imagined a motorway crash and the plod trying to grasp the severity of it
I’ve been Santa for over 20 years and still get pissed cos of the nerves in case the bairns realise I’m not the real one. And I only do it on a Christmas Eve.
The place i worked was near Flamingo land. I done my induction with a lad who was equally as pished off as i was that we had to work there. We got picked out for different departments and he was chosen for the Slaughter house. I bumped into him a few days later and he told me the Pigs were strung up on a production line and as one passed him, it pished in his face
I was a delivery boy (van lad was the term IIRC) for Alpine Pop while I waited for my apprenticeship to start.
