My wife and I were so proud of our daughter standing in front of us after trying on her Wedding Dress. "Give us a twirl," said my wife. The proudest moment of my life and all that fat bitch wants is chocolate !
I held her hand, looked her in the eye and whispered, "Before we go on, do you have any STDs?" Then for some reason she put down the menu, got up from the table and f*cked off.