A young couple were making passionate love in the guy's van when suddenly the girl, being a bit on the kinky side, yells out. "Oh bigboy, whip me, whip me!" The guy, not wanting to pass up this unique opportunity, obviously did not have any whips to hand, but in a flash of inspiration, he opens the window, snaps the antenna off his van and proceeds to whip the girl until they both collapse in sado-masochistic ecstasy. About a week later, the girl notices that the marks left by the whipping session are starting to fester a bit so she goes to the doctor. The doctor takes one look at the wounds and asks. "Did you get these marks having sex?" The girl is a little embarrassed but admits that, yes, she did. Nodding his head knowingly the doctor exclaims. "I thought so, because in all my years of doctoring...... Wait for it...... " " " " " " " " " " " " " You've got the worst case of van aerial disease that I've ever seen."
I took a girl out the other night. When she ordered the most expensive stuff on the menu, I thought,"you money grabbing tart!" So I said,"does your mother feed you this well at home?" She replied,"no, but my mum's not expecting a blow job later...." I said,"good point, enjoy your meal."