Twelve Italian priests were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up in a straight row, totally nude, in a garden while a sexy, beautiful, big breasted, nude model danced before them. Each priest had a small bell attached to his weenie, and they were told that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of them would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity. The beautiful model danced before the first candidate with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response from all the priests until she got to the final priest, Carlos. Poor Carlos. As she danced, his bell began to ring so loudly that it flew off, clattering across the ground and laid to rest in nearby foliage. Embarrassed, Carlos quickly scrambled to where the bell came to rest. He bent over to pick it up.... and all the other bells started to ring
A man went to the doctors and asked for a double dose of viagra I’m sorry I can’t give you a double dose it’s not safe But doctor I need it really bad Why asked the doctor My girlfriend is coming to town on Friday My exwife is coming on Saturday And my wife is coming Sunday All right relented said the doctor But you must come and see me on Monday so I can check you over On Monday the man walked into the doctors office his arm in a sling What happened to you asked the doctor The man replied No one showed up
BBC NEWS Prince Harry: 'I want my father and brother back' I didn't know James Hewitt had another son!
I was standing at the bar one night minding my own business. This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, "You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?" I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?" She said, "Yeah, I got a pen". I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you." Cost me 6 stitches, but when you're seventy six who cares?