Bloke wakes up in a hospital room doesn't have a clue where he is. The phone on the bedside table rings so he answers it. Bloke on the other end says; "Hello I am your doctor unfortunately you have tested positve for covid 19" Patient " bloody hell" Doctor "its worse you have also tested positive for HIV, Hepatitus and ebola - anyway we have had a meeting of all the top doctors and we have decided to put you on a pizza diet" Patient "pizza diet - will that help?" Doctor "No but its all we can slide under the door"