I went to see the band 'Elbow' a few weeks ago, and last night I went to my local and saw an 'Elbow' tribute band called 'Arse' They were very good . . . . I couldn't tell them apart.
OH MY GOD . . . . REWARD FOR NAMES ! I just came home to find all of my windows open. Someone's taken everything. Devastated isn't the word. There are some horrible people about, you can't have anything these days. I will find who did it. The kids are devastated. 2 weeks before Christmas as well. Please beware, 'cos it could happen to you . . . . in broad bloody daylight as well. As if we all are not going through enough. Gonna have to get brand new advent calendars now !
Little John walked into his dad's bedroom one day only to catch him sitting on the side of his bed sliding on a condom. John's father, in an attempt to hide his full erection with a condom on it, bent over as if to look under the bed. Little John asked curiously ''What are you doing dad ?'' His father quickly replied, ''I thought that I saw a rat go underneath the bed" to which Little John replied ''What are you gonna do . . . . **** him ?''