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Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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  2. young2077

    young2077 Well-Known Member

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    #20962
    Gil T Azell and Makemstine Roger like this.
  3. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    The wife leans over to me today, and says “ my nipples are as hot today as they were fifty years ago”.

    I said "they ought to be, ones in your coffee, and the others in your porridge".
     
    #20963
  4. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #20964
  5. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Q: If a dove is the "bird of peace" then what's the bird of "true love"?

    A: The swallow.
     
    #20965
  6. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #20966

  7. Essayyeffcee

    Essayyeffcee Well-Known Member

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  8. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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    A man is visiting his wife who is in hospital in a long term Coma.

    The nurse and a Doctor pull him to one side and tell him that they've had a breakthrough. They explained that while they were washing between her legs she moved a little and made a small moaning sound. The Doctor suggests that they give him and his wife a little privacy and he tries oral sex with her to see if it simulates her out of the coma.

    He readily agrees, and they leave the room. Two minutes later all the alarms go off on the monitors and they come rushing back in. "What happened ?" asked the Doctor?

    "I don't know" says the husband "I just got going and she started gagging and choking"
     
    #20968
  9. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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    Warning:

    If you get sent a link to listen to the Ed Sheeran and Elton John Christmas song, don't open it.

    It's a link to listen to the Ed Sheeran and Elton John Christmas song.
     
    #20969
    Draig, Brainman, spirit of 73 and 4 others like this.
  10. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  11. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  12. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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    I was walking down the road last night when I was tripped over by a violin? quickly followed by a bassoon to the face and finally a cello fell on my head.

    It was an orchestrated attack.
     
    #20972
    Draig, butcher58, Sunderpitt and 3 others like this.
  13. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    My wife walked into the living room and noticed our seven-year-old son crying.
    I said, "I just told him about Santa."
    "For f*ck's sake!" she yelled. "He's still too young to find out that's Santa's not real."
    "Not real?!" he sobbed. "Dad just told me he won't be at the shopping centre this Saturday."
     
    #20973
  14. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  15. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  16. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  17. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  18. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  19. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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  20. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan Forum Moderator

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