Nice touch by the Queen during the weekend celebrations, to recognise the first ever South Wales derby double victory by either side: 7-0 aggregate to the Swans
Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven.” Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven.” Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Six.” Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven!” Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!” Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a cat!”
Jose Mourinho gets a letter delivered to his house in Rome. Opens it, it's an electricity bill for £17,000 forwarded on from Manchester United Football Club.. He rings the club, "I think there's been a mistake, you sent me a bill but I haven't worked for you for years." No Jose sorry, but there’s no mistake...... You were the last person in the trophy room in 2017 and you left the fu*king light on!"
A client phoned the help desk to say their computer wasn't working. The screen was totally blank. After some initial checks that didn't work the engineer said that they would have to check the plug. The client got under the desk but complained that it was very dark. The technician suggested that the light should be turned on. The client said that that was not possible as they had a power cut. The technician then said, or so the story goes, "This could be serious. Can you box up the computer and send it back to us. Oh! and put a note in it saying that it is an ID 10T operating problem."
