4 accusations of racism,1 of homophobia,1 of Superfanism and oh...1 of moderator bias!! I must be a usual suspect then because I was called something and responded...
This is for those willing to attempt to alter their outlook on things. Have a read of The courage to be disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. İ like to re read it every couple of months if i find I'm slipping back to old habits. İ appreciate some of you are already have enough courage at being disliked though. Enough for yourself and half a dozen others
I once was about to purchase a boat until I actually came up close to it. The pressure to cave-in and to buy from the seller was intense even though I had, without any previous indication, decided on-the-spot that this really was not the boat for me. I had just read The Courage To Be Disliked. I stood my ground and received a major berating from the seller (who in fairness I had given every signal in communications for two weeks prior to this that I would purchase it). I walked away sheepishly but that book is what made me hold strong no matter the embarassment and tirade of abuse that was showering itself upon me. Went on to get a boat that suited me just fine a little time later. All our reactions to any situation are generated within ourselves - external forces may make you feel that you must "naturally" respond in a specific manner , but you don't have to - work out what is best for you; the reactions, taunts, anger from those around you become inconsequential. Another personal example - there was a time (because, upon reflection, I am an oddball) when I agreed wholeheartedly with people who sought refuge in bunkers and the wilderness to avoid the crass commercialism of Christmas. Then I realised that my response to all the purchasing, all the lights, all the false bon homie, was just that - my response. It came from within - it was one way of responding but it wasn't the only way to respond. When I realised that all responses to any external signal are actually generated from within oneself, it was a very easy step towards changing my response rather than getting into a state of paroxysm. So, just-like-that, I changed my attitude to walking through the crowds, the lights, the noise, the commercialism, the stresses on peoples faces - it became a nothingness to me, not by blanking out its presence but merely by acknowledging that it was not for me but clearly it is for others. The bottom line is: your response to anything is just that, your response, yet you can change it to a completely different response once you recognize (it took years of life experience to understand this) that your immediate response is not the natural, immutable and absolutely correct response that all proper-minded people undoubtedly hold.
From the quick skim I've managed so far, I think the book @Charlie1 mentioned above could be of some use to you.
I just read partridge bouncing back whenever I make a **** up in life It’s more fun ****jng things up than been boring and getting everything right all the time in your life
I forget the precise quote, or where I read it, but I recall one along the lines of, if someone offers you a gift and you refuse to accept it, then the gift remains theirs to own. The same applies with insults, all you need to do is politely decline to accept them. Generally, I find insults reveal far more about the person offering them than they do about the intended target. They often show the bits of the donor that they're not comfortable with.
I am a little feisty at times and not necessarily opinionated but passionate about things . I was with my top boss once and we were having a ding song but my wife was with me , he asked her opinion and she wisely said ‘ well everybody’s different’ She has a wise and balanced head which helps me often !! I don’t think he was keen but I survived a bit longer
Oh FFS. A Supporters Trust survey and currently 70% want to split the vocal fans up again by putting away fans in the NE corner and home fans moved back into North stand! **** that
