One Monday morning a postman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out the front door, stepping around empty beer and liquor bottles. “Wow, Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night!” the postman says. Bob, in obvious pain, replies — “Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4 am Sunday morning.” “We had about 15 couples from around the neighborhood over for some weekend fun and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk around midnight that we started playing Who Am I?” “Is that a game?” the postman asks, all curious. “How do you play that?” Bob replies — “Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us and only our ‘privates’ showing through a hole in the sheet.” “Then the women try to guess who it is.” The postman laughs and says — “Damn, I’m sorry I missed all that fun.” “Well, that’s why I came out to talk to you,” Bob says. “You better lie low for a few days, since your name came up seven times and many of the guys are looking for you.”
Johnathan Ross and Russell Brand , not finding much work, decide to rob an off licence After lifting a couple of bottles Brand nervously asks "Is this whisky Jonathan?" "Sure is, but not as whisky as wobbing a bank, now gwab some bacon fwies and wun!"
'A tough gang on motor bikes encountered a young girl looking like she was going to suicide by jumping off a bridge into the river. The head tough guy said, 'Before you jump, can I get a big lingering kiss?' The answer was yes and they kissed passionately. When finished, the tough guy said 'Tell me, why are you committing suicide?' The answer was, 'Cos my parents don't like me dressing in girls clothes'.
