"Doctor, I think I may have ADHD I can't remember where I parked my Ford." "That's not how ADHD works. " "I keep losing my Focus. "
It’s been a strange day today. First I found a hatful of money. Then I was chased by an angry man with a guitar
Wife: "Why can’t you treat me like you did when we were courting?" So her husband took her to the cinema, then onto a lovely meal, kissed her then dropped her off at her parents.
Boris Johnson and Michael Gove were holidaying in a Welsh village. One morning they were out walking Boris's dog, and decide to go to a nearby pub for a pint. Twenty minutes later a guy walks up to them, lifts the dog's tail up, then walks out. A few minutes later, a woman walks into the pub, goes straight up to Boris and Gove, lifts the dog's tail up and walks out. Boris an Gove look at each other a little bemused. A few minutes later, yet another woman walks in and again lifts up the dog's tail, an turns to walk out. " Excuse me", said Boris, "you're the third person to walk in and do that, what's it all about?" " Oh! It's nothing really" said the woman, but somebody's put it around the village that there's a dog in the pub with two arseholes "!
