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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18901
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  2. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18902
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  3. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18903
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  4. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18904
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  5. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18905
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  6. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18906
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  7. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    #18907
  8. Number 1 Jasper

    Number 1 Jasper Well-Known Member

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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I had a man from the TV Licence people at the front door this morning asking if I had a TV?
    I said "No."
    He said: "You must have, there is an Aerial on the roof."
    I said: "There is milk in the fridge but I don't have a Cow in the house...."
     
    #18909
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.
    Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said,
    'Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?'
    Grandma replied, 'Honey, my TV is my boyfriend.
    I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long.
    The religious programs make me feel good and the comedies make me laugh
    ... I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend.'
    Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible.
    She started
    adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus.
    Frustrated, she started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem.
    The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door and there stood Grandma's minister.
    The minister said, 'Hello son, is your Grandma home?'
    The little boy replied, 'Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend.'
    The minister fainted.
     
    #18910
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #18911
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  12. antipodean exile

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    #18912
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  13. antipodean exile

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    #18913
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  14. antipodean exile

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    #18914
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  15. antipodean exile

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    #18915
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  16. antipodean exile

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    #18916
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  17. antipodean exile

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    #18917
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  18. antipodean exile

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    #18918
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  19. antipodean exile

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    #18919
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  20. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    I believe she is no longer alive!!!!
     
    #18920
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