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Off Topic The Goodhand Arms

Discussion in 'Southampton' started by TheSecondStain, Jul 15, 2014.

  1. Number 1 Jasper

    Number 1 Jasper Well-Known Member

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  2. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

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  3. Number 1 Jasper

    Number 1 Jasper Well-Known Member

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    #49003
    saintrichie123 likes this.
  4. fran-MLs little camera

    fran-MLs little camera Well-Known Member

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    Gwyneth Paltrow has admitted to eating bread during lockdown....yes, bread! Has the woman no shame.
     
    #49004
    thereisonlyoneno7 and davecg69 like this.
  5. davecg69

    davecg69 Well-Known Member

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    :emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm

    I can only think it was gluten free, wholemeal, vegan friendly bread ...... tastes like cardboard ... :emoticon-0119-puke:
     
    #49005
    Number 1 Jasper likes this.
  6. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

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    I walked down a street & the houses were numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K & 1MB.

    It was like a trip down memory lane.
     
    #49006
  7. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

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  8. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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    Two guys were out walking their dogs on a hot day when they pass by a pub.

    The first guy says, “Let’s go in there for a pint.”

    The second guy says, “They won’t let us in with our dogs.”

    First guy: “Sure they will, just follow my lead.”

    He goes up to the pub, and sure enough, the bouncer says, “I can’t let you in here with that dog.”

    He replies, “Oh, I’m blind and this is my seeing-eye dog.”

    The bouncer says, “Ok then, come on in.”

    The second guy sees this and does the same thing. The bouncer says, “You can’t come in here with a dog.”

    He replies, “I’m blind and this is my seeing-eye dog.”

    The bouncer responds, “You have a Chihuahua for a seeing-eye dog?”

    The second guy exclaims, “They gave me a Chihuahua?”
     
    #49008
  9. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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    One day in a school room the teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

    Molly put up her hand and said,

    “My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”

    The teacher said,

    “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not ‘fascinating’.”

    Sally raised her hand.

    She said,

    “My family went to see The Grand Canyon and I was fascinated.”

    The teacher said,

    “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”

    Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher, being a little hesitant on account of she had been burned by Little Johnny before, finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.

    Johnny said,

    “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight!”
     
    #49009
  10. Le Tissier's Laces

    Le Tissier's Laces Well-Known Member

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    That would be an awful move.
     
    #49010

  11. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
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    Can't see it happening myself.
     
    #49011
    Le Tissier’s Laces likes this.
  12. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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    If you want to replace Daniel Craig, you know thereisonlyoneno7........
     
    #49012
    SaintMarv, davecg69 and ChilcoSaint like this.
  13. ChilcoSaint

    ChilcoSaint What a disgrace
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    FTFY
     
    #49013
    thereisonlyoneno7 likes this.
  14. saintrichie123

    saintrichie123 Well-Known Member

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  15. SaintMarv

    SaintMarv Well-Known Member

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    If you like peas

     
    #49015
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  16. Number 1 Jasper

    Number 1 Jasper Well-Known Member

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  17. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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  18. The 83rd Minute

    The 83rd Minute Well-Known Member

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    Yesterday I signed a £200k a week contract to join Manchester City next season as their new striker.

    Just need them to sign it now.
     
    #49018
  19. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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    An American on vacation in Ireland walks into a pub and says,

    “I hear you Irish can drink, I’ll give a thousand bucks
    to the guy who can drink 10 pints of Guinness in under 5 minutes”

    Everyone is quiet but one of the Irishmen gets up and leaves.

    In a few minutes the Irishman walks back in and says,

    “Line me up 10 pints of Guinness” and he drinks them in 4 minutes flat.

    As the guy is paying him the $1000 he asks the Irishman,

    “If ya dont mind me asking, when you left earlier, where did you go”

    The Irishman says,

    “I had to go to the pub next door because I wanted to make sure I could do it”
     
    #49019
  20. thereisonlyoneno7

    thereisonlyoneno7 Well-Known Member

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    Took me about 2 mins. 76AEA094-55BB-4E70-9CC3-B462F7D42789.jpeg
     
    #49020

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