Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

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I was on the train going to work yesterday. I saw a bloke, must’ve been at least 6 feet tall, big bushy beard. He was wearing the shortest mini skirt ever and no underwear. Have to admit that showed a lot of balls.

 

A man sees a lady with big breasts. He asks, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for £1000?" She agrees.
She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes.
Eventually the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?"
He replies, "No, it's too expensive!"

 

My mate was in jail for computer fraud so I uploaded a file on his phone

 

Took me a while. Clever.

 

Back in the days of tanners and bobs,
When Mothers had patience and Fathers had jobs.
When football team families wore hand me down shoes,
And T.V gave only two channels to chose.
Back in the days of three penny bits,
when schools employed nurses to search for your nits.
When snowballs were harmless; ice slides were permitted
and all of your jumpers were warm and hand knitted.
Back in the days of hot ginger beers,
when children remained so for more than six years.
When children respected what older folks said,
and pot was a thing you kept under your bed.
Back in the days of Listen with Mother,
when neighbours were friendly and talked to each other.
When cars were so rare you could play in the street.
When Doctors made house calls; Police walked the beat.
Back in the days of Milligan's Goons,
when butter was butter and songs all had tunes.
It was dumplings for dinner and trifle for tea,
and your annual break was a day by the sea.
Back in the days of Dixon's Dock Green,
Crackerjack pens and Lyons ice cream.
When children could freely wear National Health glasses,
and teachers all stood at the FRONT of their classes
Back in the days of rocking and reeling,
when mobiles were things that you hung from the ceiling.
When woodwork and pottery got taught in schools,
and everyone dreamed of a win on the pools.
Back in the days when I was a lad,
I can't help but smile for the fun that I had.
Hopscotch and roller skates; snowballs to lob.
Back in the days of tanners and bobs.

 

Superb that mate, superb.

 

Enjoyed reading that