1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

Page 486 of 747
  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9701
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9702
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9703
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9704
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9705
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9706
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 21, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9707
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 22, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9708
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 22, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    Jurgen Klopp flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi boy play football. Kloppy is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over.
    Two weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down to Chelsea with only 20 minutes left, Klopp gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he goes.
    The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game for Liverpool. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.
    When the lad comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in English football.
    'Hello mum, guess what?' he says 'I played for 20 minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me.'
    'Wonderful,' says his mum, 'Let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, gang raped and beaten up and now your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all while you were having such great time.'
    The young lad is very upset. 'What can I say mum, but I'm really sorry..'
    'Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!' screams his mum, 'it's your f*cking fault we came to Liverpool in the first place!'
     
    #9709
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 23, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9710
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 23, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9711
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 23, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  12. BluefromBridgend

    BluefromBridgend Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2011
    Messages:
    18,259
    Likes Received:
    9,076
    Oi, that's my old car.
     
    #9712
    BluefromBridgend, Oct 24, 2020
    Didley Squat, Wooperts_duck and San Diego like this.
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9713
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    My wife says she is leaving me because she thinks I'm obsessed with astronomy...........



    What planet is she on?
     
    #9714
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego, Gordon Armstrong and 1 other person like this.
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    I remember when I first started dating my wife, I got a hard-on just watching her eating a banana...



    Now after ten years of marriage, I only get aroused if she starts choking on it!
     
    #9715
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    I went by the house where I grew up today and asked to go in to look around, but they said no and shut the door in my face...



    My parents can be so rude!
     
    #9716
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    If anyone wants to come and talk to me about my shoddy joinery work...

    My door is always open.
     
    #9717
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego, Gordon Armstrong and 1 other person like this.
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9718
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    Do gun manuals have a troubleshooting section?
     
    #9719
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,480
    Likes Received:
    263,511
    please log in to view this image
     
    #9720
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 25, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
Page 486 of 747
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

Share This Page