1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

Page 439 of 748
  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    There were three native Indian women. One slept on a deer skin, one slept on an elk skin, and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant.

    The first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys.

    This just goes to prove that the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.
     
    #8761
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 2, 2020
    San Diego, Taffvalerowdy and Didley Squat like this.
  2. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2011
    Messages:
    126,387
    Likes Received:
    225,166
    upload_2020-6-3_11-48-40.jpeg
     
    #8762
    Taffvalerowdy, Jun 3, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong, Wooperts_duck and San Diego like this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8763
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego and Taffvalerowdy like this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    The Government in Egypt has asked the city's taxi drivers to drive around Cairo sounding their car horns.

    It is hoped that the familiar sounds of the city will induce a return to tranquillity and normality following the recent pandemic.

    Operation Toot 'n Calm 'Em will last for the rest of the week
     
    #8764
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    Those Space X lads aren’t due back for a while.

    Plenty of time for everyone to buy a gorilla suit and learn to ride a horse.
     
    #8765
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8766
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8767
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8768
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8769
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8770
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8771
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 3, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8772
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8773
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8774
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8775
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    An Irish Priest transferred to Texas:
    Father O’Malley rose from his bed one morning. It was a fine spring day in his new west Texas mission parish.
    He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside.
    He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn.
    He promptly called the local police station.
    The conversation went like this:
    “Good morning. This is Sergeant Jones. How might I help you?”
    “And the best of the day to yerself. This is Father O’Malley at St. Ann’s Catholic Church. There’s a jackass lying dead in me front lawn and would ye be so kind as to send a couple of’yer lads to take care of the matter?”
    Sergeant Jones, considering himself to be quite a wit and recognizing the foreign accent, thought he would have a little fun with the good father, replied,
    “Well now Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of the last rites!”
    There was dead silence on the line for a long moment…
    Father O’Malley then replied, “Aye, ’tis certainly true, but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin first, which is the reason for me call.”
     
    #8776
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    Just been to Tesco and swapped 50 raisins for 100 sultanas.

    I can't believe the currant exchange rate.
     
    #8777
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8778
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 4, 2020
    Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8779
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 5, 2020
    San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    144,696
    Likes Received:
    263,770
    please log in to view this image
     
    #8780
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 5, 2020
    San Diego likes this.
Page 439 of 748
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

Share This Page