Which was my point, if I changed your username, it should change the history to. Which is why you are a pain, because everytime you ask me to do it, it hangs for fooking ever. Tel's answered my question anyway.
I appreciate all your points ... and you won't find me ever saying it's a cowards way out ... absolutely not ... but, even by definition, I think it is selfish in that there is no accountability for the individual after the act ... they obtain some form of peace which, at the same time is denied to the family left behind who, in contrast, have a world of pain and grief to contend with and may never fully get over the loss. Everyone will have their view and there is no right or wrong - just individual opinion Personally, whilst I have had a few occasions where I have been at a very low ebb indeed, the thought of leaving my girls and the missus to deal with the aftermath has always overridden the darkest of thoughts.
Your last paragraph, that is not said or thought through the mind of someone mentally ill and who commits or who has thoughts of suicide, you are confusing what you deem as 'rational' or 'normal' behaviour against that of a person contemplating suicide at the darkest level imaginable. It's not selfish to be on the bottom rung of a ladder and to slip off.
Surely people who commit suicide think that their loved ones will be better off without them around. Until you’ve hit that low I don’t think anyone can really judge the selfishness of suicide.
Agreed mate. Although I accept that for some that may not be a something they are mentally in a position to consider. I'm assuming you mean losing someone to suicide is worse than to murder. I'd agree with that. Both are unthinkable for any loved one, but with suicide you'd spend your whole life feeling the rejection and also wondering if you were somehow partly responsible... or at the very least not being important enough for that person to live for. Having been through a very personal and harrowing loss of one of the 4 most important people in my life, it's bad enough spending every day blaming yourself that you could/should've done more to save them without having to deal with all that above as well tbh.
The only thing that stopped me was the fact that my ****bag waste of space dad did it before me. He literally saved my life by being a useless ****up. Got to be careful about being vocal regarding certain things because it’s not normal, I won’t go into detail.
Suicide certainly isn’t cowardly. But it is, by definition, a selfish act. Self absorption leading to self obsession, self loathing, and ultimately self destruction. One of the best ways out of the cycle of despair, is to take an interest in something - or someone - outside yourself. There’s a huge difference imo, between a physically healthy person taking their own life, and someone with a chronic incurable condition doing it; but I do take the point about unbearable mental pain.
Yeah, that’s exactly what I mean. For years after - decades even - friends and family still torment themselves that they could or should have done something different. The fact is they weren’t to blame for the death of their loved one, and usually they know that, but I’ve seen people carry that pain with them for a lifetime. I went to the funeral of a young lad once, who threw himself in front of a train. That was the most tragic event I’ve ever attended. And the funeral was packed, the poor bastard never knew how many people loved him. This will sound harsh, but if he’d pulled his head out of his arse for long enough to look around him, maybe he’d have seen that and stepped back, but I’ll accept that the reason he didn’t was because he couldn’t .
I do understand that, especially the first part. It’s the rest that follows... Take an interest in something or somebody... When my mental health strikes at its worst I can’t take an interest in getting a shower never mind something or somebody else. I’m way to far gone for that and only professional intervention can pull me out of it. With regards to the second paragraph. It’s kind of contradictory because you say there’s a huge difference between physically healthy person (like me) and somebody with a chronic incurable condition committing suicide. The vast majority of mental health conditions are incurable. I’d happily swap my condition for something like arthritis or fibromyalgia. I can deal with physical pain but mental pain has a grip over me.
Fair enough, I've never been so far down that I can't function, so I'm not about judge anyone who has. It helps you having a dog though, right? Another living thing to care for? And it's pretty well documented that exercising outdoors in natural daylight is effective in dealing with depression (if that's what you suffer from).
Have something to look forward to. Set yourself challenges and do them. Doesn't matter what is is, just do it. As humans we need stuff to occupy us otherwise we fester. Stay strong.
Nice sentiment but extremely difficult if you're in a bad state of mind. Not just difficult but extremely difficult.
I would say that most people with depression will know of things that can help, things such as exercise and fresh air, hobbies and being sociable can all be very effective for certain people. Actually acting on it and finding the strength to do these things is a whole new matter when at your lowest though, well in my experience anyway.
Works for me. I've been through some bad times. Always having something to do and doing it gets me through.
I'm not trying to get into "which is worse" argument but serious physical impairment often leads to mental health problems if only due to the restrictive lifestyle it can often lead to .
I very much doubt, going for walks, having hobbies and being more sociable would have changed the reason Caroline Flack took her life.
Yup. "Shine your shoes". That's what old timers in AA used to say to newcomers. Obviously you can't shine trainers.
