1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12421
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12422
    antipodean exile likes this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12423
    antipodean exile likes this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12424
    antipodean exile likes this.
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12425
    antipodean exile likes this.
  6. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12426
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  7. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12427
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  8. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12428
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  9. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12429
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  10. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12430
    Wooperts_duck likes this.

  11. devonFRATTONiser

    devonFRATTONiser Well-Known Member
    Forum Moderator

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2011
    Messages:
    8,350
    Likes Received:
    3,142
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12431
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12432
    antipodean exile likes this.
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12433
    antipodean exile likes this.
  14. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12434
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  15. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12435
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  16. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12436
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  17. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12437
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  18. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2012
    Messages:
    29,259
    Likes Received:
    27,429
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12438
    Wooperts_duck likes this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    Dave the Scouser is touring the USA. Along the way, he stops off at a remote bar in the Nevada desert and chats to the bartender when he spots a Red Indian in full tribal dress seated in the corner of the bar.

    "Blimey!" remarks Dave. "Who's he?"

    "Gee, that's the memory man," replies the bartender. "He knows everything there is to know. Got a memory like an elephant, he can remember any fact. Heck, go and try him out!"

    Dave heads over to the Red Indian, thinking that he can outsmart him with a question about English football.

    He asks the memory man, "Who won the 1965 FA cup final?"

    "Liverpool," came the instantaneous reply.

    Dave was stunned. He tried again asking, "Who did they beat?"

    "Leeds," replied the memory man.

    Dave tried once more asking, "What was the final score?"

    The wise Red Indian didn't hesitate in answering, "2-1."

    Dave thinks he'll get smart, asking the memory man for the name of the winning goal scorer. Without so much as blinking, the Red Indian says, "Ian St John."

    Dave is stunned and returns home to Liverpool, where he tells everyone about the Red Indian. Dave's curiosity lingers, and he vows to return to America and pay his respects to the Indian. Ten years later, Dave finally saved up enough money to return and, after weeks of searching the Nevada desert, once more he finds the Red Indian, now in a cave.

    Humbled by the Red Indian, Dave steps forward, bows, and greets the brave in his traditional tongue.

    "How," Dave says.

    The memory man squints at him and replies, "A diving header in the six-yard box."
     
    #12439
    antipodean exile likes this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    143,844
    Likes Received:
    262,465
    please log in to view this image
     
    #12440
    antipodean exile likes this.

Share This Page