Dear windless Do you mean you can't produce wind or you can't expel it? Mrs K. PS you could try a spell checker for your diabolical spelling .
Not sure if you are referring to myself Mrs K but l'll learning all the time. Soon, l'll be stringing two or three words together, just like all the members here. Until then, have a grrrrrrreat Straya Day!
Dear Mrs K, I am really worried about Brexit. If there is a "No Deal" on the cards, does that mean I will need to obtain a new passport for my German Shepherd dog Adolph ? If not, will he be deported to Berlin ? Whilst I am writing to you, can you please recommend a decent bottle of wine, as I am entertaining a young lady this weekend. Nothing too expensive mind, just sufficient to impress her. Anything between £3 to £5 would be great, so that will leave me a couple of quid for her bus fare home. Cheers, Herman Von Kraut
This brexit no deal stuff Is it the UK TV version of deal or no deal What's the big deal Take the bag or the money Or ask the audience Also Herman there are some really good cheap Australian wines out there (are there any other type of Australian wines ) Would leave you with money to spare after the bus fare Oops Sorry if my answering for you offends you Mrs k
Mrs K is on sick leave so you will have to fend for yourselves until she is able to cease coughing for more than 2 minutes. However, Mr k is available as back up if your need is desperate.
Dear Mr K, Pleased to see you are taking your new promotion seriously. Are you able to advise on medical matters of a personal nature ? Just asking for a friend.... Anon
UPDATE Mrs K is still on sick leave. Mr k should be here to advise you in her absence but I suspect he is in the pub. She hopes to be back soon.
To be honest, I'm thinking of demanding a refund, Didley. I mean, £15.00 is a lot of money for a trial period.....
Dear Mrs. K. A friend of mine might have 3 balls, though tests have confirmed that 'one of them' is a 'lost' varicose vein. I have told my . . . . sorry, he has told his wife that it 'isn't right, like' but she refuses to 'kiss it better' 'cos she's obviously a bitch ! He's not a contortionist so he hasn't got that option, so he might be knackered as far as trying to con his wife is concerned ! Am I . . . . sorry, is he talking bollocks or can you help
Dear Mrs K, Gordon's friend is still having problems in his testicular area. He contacted me last night, in a shocking state, to say they are getting larger every day. Please can you hurry up with your medical diagnosis, before they explode ! Hoping this finds you feeling better yourself. Sincerely yours, Arfur Daily-Mail
He needs to put an elastic band around them and place them in a bowl of rice pudding Semolina will do but he has to remember the jam
That doesn't fecking well work How long was I . . . . sorry, he supposed to do that for, and is the redness 'cos of the tightness, the length (of time), the disease or the jam (raspberry in this case)
