Management Advice for Luvgonzo

@luvgonzo has been promoted to Team Manager (I know, the rest of them must be absolute clowns). He wants advice on how to approach management as he's concerned that his colleagues won't like him.

I've offered my opinion (see below) but he should consider various management styles so do a good deed and post some tips for our resident Kirk Sutherland lookalike.

"You may as well be an utter **** to them. If you're nice to them they'll still hate you but they'll think you're a soft touch. Give them hell. Start off by randomly firing the one you dislike the most. Do it in front of everyone and look like you're really enjoying it. If possible throw him or her out of a window."

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#leaderluv

 

@Commachio

I found that military style makes people cry. I have to be nice and stuff.

 

I've been in management positions before and for quite a long time. Which is kinda scary... For them.

 

I feel that I should swear less so that's my first change, less profanity. I helped someone today with a system issue and my comment was "how do you get through the day y'dick?".

 

****

 

A fair dose of bullying has been proven to get the best out of employees. Try to target the vulnerable ones who really need the job to put food on the table.

 

Problem is I really don't like people and just expect them to do what I say without question. In the modern world you have to be all sensitive to the needs of different people. This bores me, I have quite a diverse team and they are very needy.

 

Team Leader, so basically you've turned into managements dogs body for needy people, fooking great, good luck with that one mate!

Anyway, in answer to the OP question, just be yourself, the quickest way of failing is by copying a predecessor.

 

Worked as a manager in the NHS for 16 years. My advice don't go down the 'softly softly I want you to be my friend' route coz they'll walk all over you.

Let's face it, as an employee we are like toddlers, simply seeing how much **** we can get away with, without getting into trouble.

 

I think it'll be more me having to tone it down a bit that is needed, I'm never going to be a nice boss but I may have to be a bit nicer.

In my last job I had a meeting about why everyone cries a lot.

 

Did you work with a lot of Liverpool fans?

 

Was the answer that you're a ****?

 

And they won't like you then anyway.

 

Cries!?

Who the fook do you work with men or women?

 

Both.

 

I assume it's the women crying, don't think i've ever seen a guy cry at work...well maybe once many years ago, anxiety.

 

Could be a 20+ pager this......until next week when Gonz get hauled in front of a labour committee.

 

Exactly. My natural disposition is to be really easy going and friendly with people. But as a manager you have to adopt a bit of hard nosed approach, otherwise people think they can get away with **** and you won't do anything about it.