Proves my point. Men are immune to wedding cake. Wimmin, after eating wedding cake, suddenly think they decide when the shaggin happens. Gas, our hero, knowing this, kicked all his wives to the kerb as soon as they started showing signs of wedding cake syndrome. @gas
Christmas cake, plain, not covered in icing. I made a very nice cake for the charity thing at work: apple and blackberry tray bake, first time I've participated to such an extent. The amount of sugar, butter and whipping cream that went into it was ridiculous. As a former fat c*nt I'm going to experiment at making something similar with say a third the calories. Need to stop being a lazy cu*t and get on with it. Bought the Tom Kerridge cook book btw, I've been doing similar things to him for 18 months but worth checking out his ideas.
I am in fact a most excellent baker. I'd go on that Great British Bake Off but as I am not an ehtnic or a poove I wouldn't get a look in. Also I don't know if I could stop myself smacking Noel Fielding in the eye, he gets on my tits. I am good at the basic cakes but I don't do all that poncy decoration stuff at all well, I wouldn't produce anything like the show stoppers with all the fancy icing and that. The family don't like some of my best creations so I don't get to make them often but my carrot cake and banana cake are the stuff of legend. I also knock out an excellent Victoria Sponge, lemon Madeira cake, cherry bundt cake, marble cake, fruit cake, and a series of smaller individual cakes too such as traditional Bakewell tarts and every year my orders for home made mince pies gets longer and longer. There's not a lot that I am truly good at but baking is one of the things I do exceedingly well.
That Paul Hollywood is swimming in minge, is he a poove just because he knows how to plait a loaf? I am a confident heterosexual and comfortable wearing an apron. Bakers be Bakin' Haters be Hatin'.
